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Hi everyone! I am a first time puppy owner (33 years old) and am experiencing what seems to be the "puppy blues." I am at the end of my 5th day with Eloise (11-weeks, Cavalier King Charles Spaniel). She is gorgeous and seems so smart! I absolutely adore her when I'm in the moment, but I can't keep from thinking, "Am I really ready for this?" or "What have I done?"
I know the problem with my anxiety is ME, not the puppy. She is great and so eager to please. I am probably starting slower than everyone else and am only tackling one thing at a time (it seems). We are working on potty-training and I know it will not happen overnight. I take her out at least 8 times a day (including twice overnight) and she hasn't had many accidents inside the house. She is not loving her crate and whines a lot when I put her in it at night. (Time of whining varies, but has been anywhere from 5 minutes to 25 minutes.) This BREAKS my heart. I ignore her, but it's awful. I don't want to put her in because of it. I do it because I know she's safe and just has to get used to it. I also know that she will eventually grow to love it. But the minute she whines, all of my logic goes out the window and all I think is that I'm a bad mother...
Also, I can't get the nagging "What-ifs?" out of my mind. What if I take her to the vet and she has a major medical problem? (I'm by no means rich and can't afford a sickly dog.) What if she swallows something when I can't see her? What if she actually never does learn to love her crate? (Btw, only using crate training until she is potty-trained fully...I am expecting to keep her in the crate for a few more months.) What if she turns out to be aggressive towards other dogs? What if she has separation anxiety? What if her teething stage proves to be a permanent chewing problem? Etc, etc, etc.
I certainly don't resent the puppy and know that what I have done with her so far is above and beyond what some others do. She seems happy. I also realize that it's only been 5 days. Coupled with lack of sleep and appetite (on my part), I am overthinking everything and seem to have a few anxiety attacks a day.
I don't really know what else to say. But, for example, we had a really good night (minor whining, no accidents) and morning. I left her in the bathroom (with the crate barricading the door (but available for her to climb in if needed) with her doggy bed and toys. She whined when I left and I was unable to get back to her for 6 hours. I fully expected that she would poo and pee on the pads, but she held it in. I was amazed. We then took a nice little walk, I let her hang outside for a few minutes and then we spent 30 minutes playing before I had to put her back inside the bathroom to go back to work.
Really, something to be proud of! Instead, I am now at work, with the anxiety kicking in again. I dread going home. What if she has had an accident in the 4 hours since? How long is she going to whine in her crate tonight? How many hours of sleep am I going to lose due to whining or my anxiety? Will she ever be able to just hang out in the house without being crated or in the bathroom? Does she hate me? Why is she shaking so much when I take her out for her nightly (1 am and 5 am) potty? Etc, etc, etc.
I don't know what to do anymore. I am trying to take it a day at a time, but I feel like my family and friends are over my own whining! I just need some reassurance. Please help!!
I know the problem with my anxiety is ME, not the puppy. She is great and so eager to please. I am probably starting slower than everyone else and am only tackling one thing at a time (it seems). We are working on potty-training and I know it will not happen overnight. I take her out at least 8 times a day (including twice overnight) and she hasn't had many accidents inside the house. She is not loving her crate and whines a lot when I put her in it at night. (Time of whining varies, but has been anywhere from 5 minutes to 25 minutes.) This BREAKS my heart. I ignore her, but it's awful. I don't want to put her in because of it. I do it because I know she's safe and just has to get used to it. I also know that she will eventually grow to love it. But the minute she whines, all of my logic goes out the window and all I think is that I'm a bad mother...
Also, I can't get the nagging "What-ifs?" out of my mind. What if I take her to the vet and she has a major medical problem? (I'm by no means rich and can't afford a sickly dog.) What if she swallows something when I can't see her? What if she actually never does learn to love her crate? (Btw, only using crate training until she is potty-trained fully...I am expecting to keep her in the crate for a few more months.) What if she turns out to be aggressive towards other dogs? What if she has separation anxiety? What if her teething stage proves to be a permanent chewing problem? Etc, etc, etc.
I certainly don't resent the puppy and know that what I have done with her so far is above and beyond what some others do. She seems happy. I also realize that it's only been 5 days. Coupled with lack of sleep and appetite (on my part), I am overthinking everything and seem to have a few anxiety attacks a day.
I don't really know what else to say. But, for example, we had a really good night (minor whining, no accidents) and morning. I left her in the bathroom (with the crate barricading the door (but available for her to climb in if needed) with her doggy bed and toys. She whined when I left and I was unable to get back to her for 6 hours. I fully expected that she would poo and pee on the pads, but she held it in. I was amazed. We then took a nice little walk, I let her hang outside for a few minutes and then we spent 30 minutes playing before I had to put her back inside the bathroom to go back to work.
Really, something to be proud of! Instead, I am now at work, with the anxiety kicking in again. I dread going home. What if she has had an accident in the 4 hours since? How long is she going to whine in her crate tonight? How many hours of sleep am I going to lose due to whining or my anxiety? Will she ever be able to just hang out in the house without being crated or in the bathroom? Does she hate me? Why is she shaking so much when I take her out for her nightly (1 am and 5 am) potty? Etc, etc, etc.
I don't know what to do anymore. I am trying to take it a day at a time, but I feel like my family and friends are over my own whining! I just need some reassurance. Please help!!