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Hi, I am Tony and I have a question about my lab/Dalmatian mix; well more or less a problem. I love my 5 month old puppy to death but there are major problems in the house hold. First of all she is very well mannered which I love. I am pretty sure she is will mannered due to the fact she is scared of everything. No joke until yesterday she was afraid to go up the stairs at all till forced her to walk up them herself. Tolli the name of my pup also has this thing called (separation anxiety). When ever i leave her to free roam i the house while going to work she pee and poos in the house every time.I leave the house three times a day due to my job and when I come back there is always poop and pee to clean. This is getting old fast I really starting to get mad. I had a few friend who had dogs that are now fully grown. The said the had some of the same problems. They told me to do what the did. Both their full grown dogs are well trained now and are very friendly toward their owner.

Both of my friends told me to pick my pup up take her to the spot were they pooped and pissed and show them the mess then firmly pop them on the butt. I did not want to do this at first but after a few more days the Pooping and peeing got worse. I then did as the said, now it seems as though my puppy is scared of of me. She shakes like crazy when she decides to listen to me calling her and she tucks her tail between her legs when I pick her up. I really want this peeing and pooping in the house to stop and I want the loving look back in her eyes not the gaze of fear.

Ps. she at first followed me everywhere A week later i tapped that butt and now she only follows me to the kitchen. We still have are moments but if feels like she is trying to make up for something. I just want to know the best way to make her understand that pooping in the house is bad. Other than that I really have no problems as of yet, besides the fear of everything. Yet she barks at bigger dogs until she is over welled by their size.
 

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1. She does not have separation anxiety. She is just not housetrained.

2. Never force your dog to do anything. Never rub their nose or any part of them in any mess they do. Dogs do not understand why you are scolding them. The dog only learns that you are a mean and scary person. You should be forming a bond with the puppy, not making them scared. The advice you were given is very wrong and if you continue to force the dog and keep up with these corrections, you will have a dog that absolutely fears you and has no trust in you whatsoever.

3. Start housetraining her. Keep her on a leash and the leash attached to your belt. Take her outside to potty every hour, on the hour. If she pees/poops outside, reward heavily. Lots of yummy treats (small bits of hot dog, chicken, etc.). Make it a wonderful thing for her to go to the bathroom outside. If she pees/poops inside, ignore her. Just clean it up and then whack yourself over the head and say "Bad owner! I should have been watching her and taken her outside!"

If she starts to pee/poop in the house quickly say something and pick her up and take her outside to finish. Reward her for finishing outside.

Clean every mess up with an enzymatic cleaner. Nature's Miracle is a brand that is most often recommended. It takes out the "pee/poop here smell" that a dogs urine and feces make.

When you have to leave the house, put her in a kennel that is only big enough for her to stand up, lay down, and turn around in. You can't leave her for long periods of time though. You need to come home and let her out to potty.


Edit: Here is a good sticky to read through Housetraining Sticky
 

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Your state of mind is very important when dealing with dogs. When you are angry, they can pick up on this energy and become scared or unbalanced. It's always important to stay confident and calm around them.

Keep in mind, in the wild, wolves follow a calm leader wolf. If you want your dog to follow the rules of your house, it is very important you stay calm at all times.
 

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Discussion Starter #4
She really hates closed in spaces as is, you said never to force her how do I get her in a Kennel?
 

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Teach her the kennel is a wondrous place where lots of treats happen. It takes time and work but you can get her to like it. Get a kennel and keep the door open. Throw in a piece of chicken (or some other high value treat). Let her get in and eat it (keeping the door open) and when she comes out again throw another piece inside. Do this 10 times 3x a day. Keep it fun. Then the next day, if she's ready, throw a piece in and just move the door a little, never fully closing it. Go slow. Do this until she is comfortable. Get her to then stay in the kennel while you feed her treats. Then after she is comfortable give her a command for going in and then let her go in and wait 2 seconds, then treat. Once she knows that the kennel is a fun place where she is fed, start feeding meals in there when the door opens. Then start closing the door for short periods of time. Then put her in and give her a Kong that has food in it with some peanut smeared on the outside and frozen. She will lick, chew, eat this and be content without too much fuss.

This takes time though. Depending on how well you do and how well she habituates to the crate this could take a week or it could take a month. In the meantime, put her somewhere secure if you have to leave. Put her in a bathroom with the door closed (and anything important put up) to at least make sure she doesn't get into anything dangerous. Or make an expen where you can leave her with some toys.

Do you take her out before you leave to pee/poop? She hasn't learned that defecating outside is what you want. To teach a dog to go outside it takes repetition, rewards for the right behavior, and lots of patience.

How long are you gone at a time? If it's more than 4 hours, hire someone to come inside and take the dog outside to pee/poop. The more she pees/poops inside the less clear it is for her to distinguish what you want. You need to have her pee/poop outside often enough and be rewarded enough for it so she thinks to herself "I want to hold it so when my owner comes home I can go outside and get food!" essentially.

Edit: This is the same idea: Crate Training (Clicking refers to clicker training - something you might want to look into as well if you get the time)
 

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1. She does not have separation anxiety. She is just not housetrained.

2. Never force your dog to do anything. Never rub their nose or any part of them in any mess they do. Dogs do not understand why you are scolding them. The dog only learns that you are a mean and scary person. You should be forming a bond with the puppy, not making them scared. The advice you were given is very wrong and if you continue to force the dog and keep up with these corrections, you will have a dog that absolutely fears you and has no trust in you whatsoever.

3. Start housetraining her. Keep her on a leash and the leash attached to your belt. Take her outside to potty every hour, on the hour. If she pees/poops outside, reward heavily. Lots of yummy treats (small bits of hot dog, chicken, etc.). Make it a wonderful thing for her to go to the bathroom outside. If she pees/poops inside, ignore her. Just clean it up and then whack yourself over the head and say "Bad owner! I should have been watching her and taken her outside!"

If she starts to pee/poop in the house quickly say something and pick her up and take her outside to finish. Reward her for finishing outside.

Clean every mess up with an enzymatic cleaner. Nature's Miracle is a brand that is most often recommended. It takes out the "pee/poop here smell" that a dogs urine and feces make.

When you have to leave the house, put her in a kennel that is only big enough for her to stand up, lay down, and turn around in. You can't leave her for long periods of time though. You need to come home and let her out to potty.


Edit: Here is a good sticky to read through Housetraining Sticky
I agree with everything here. Dogs need a pack leader. Make sure you take her out on the leash as often as possible, and try to stay as balanced as posible. When you are scared or angry you excrete a scent that dogs pick up on. Dogs are also very much based on body language. Being angry only creates chaos for the dog. Keep it simple. If she's afraid, do not sympathise. Pretend that there is nothing wrong, or even better, move TOWARDS what she is afraid of yourself. You need to be the boss, and she needs to gain trust in you to take the lead or she won't be able to relax easily.

Potty training is pretty simple: dogs naturally will not urinate or defecate in their nests, so keep it clean and take her for regular walks or let her walk in the yard. You'll be able to read the signals when she needs to go, so lead her outside when you see this. Also, half an hour after eating/drinking taking her outside works, too.

How old was she when you got her? Our puppy is 8 weeks old and she is already "potty trained". Her mother cleaned her nest regularly, so she only does her thing outside on the grass and prefers not to do so in the house. She whines when she needs to go. When we first got her she was also fearful. We walk her three times a day and introduce her to new situations every day. We also play with her - but make sure that we start and stop when we chose to. YOU control these things, not her. If she wants to play, wait until she calms down, and play with her then as a reward for her calmness. Encourage her peaceful moments.

Have you considered puppy training? Or just reading up about dog behavior amongst themselves? I find I learned most from watching our dogs all my life, and seeing how they behave in the pack. Seeing how the other dogs react to the pack leader opened my eyes to many things that I thought were "cute" but were actually behaviors you should prevent. Keep us posted on how things are!
 

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Some tips on crate training:

1. Leave it in the place she lives in.
2. feed her in it.
3. if she does not enter the crate for the food, put the bowls at the entrance so she slowly builds confidence.
4. Play with her when she's close to the crate.
5. Give her a treat she loves! Something smelly, like a bully stick or a dried cow meat chew toy. The rule is: she may only eat it when she is in the crate. If she comes outside of the crate, claim the treat (no violence, just hold still above her or use something else like a kibble to let go if she does not already) and patiently place it back in the crate. Repeat this! No matter how boring it gets, repetition is key!

Our pup was afraid of the crate (mainly the sound it made when she entered and exited it) and these techniques have her entering the crate (still a little hesitantly, yet still entering by free will) within two days. Here, she cannot be punished! She associates things around her with bad events, and teaching her she is not safe in her crate will make her avoid being in there. Walking is key! Don't get insecure, pretend it's all fine and improvise. If she doesn't move, use food or a toy, or pick her up onto her legs. Dogs are more body language than verbal, so try really channeling everything into your body language.
 

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Great advice from Nil, as usual! The only thing I would suggest doing differently from what Nil said, is, if you have to leave her in the bathroom until she is used to her crate, don't shut the door. Use a baby/toddler gate to block off the door way. Closing the door makes it seem very isolated, and if she's not good with closed in spaces, that may cause some issues. A baby gate across the doorway will at least allow her to see out. If she can jump over a baby gate, you can put one on top of the other to make a "double gate".
 
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