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Hi.
My husband really wanted a dog for years and I am a cat person. When my beloved cat passed I agreed it would be a dog next. Few weeks ago I thought yes I am ready for a dog. We contacted resuce homes and found a springer dog. We spent nearly 2 weeks visiting him and getting to know him, it was fun and very active always being outdoors. I had vision's of a small dog to be honest but my husband was desperate for springer or beagle. So we got home and it was like I was hit with a brick of reality, its literally only been 2 days. However I have spent the whole time crying and hiding in our bedroom, my husband is already building a bond. Am giving myself terrible pressure, I am also off work which is out of routine so am just sitting round my house watching him and over thinking. I am desperate to make sure I have the best friend bond. Is it too early to even be thinking like this ? Am I a terrible person? All I see is the positive and everyone saying how amazing it is.....
Thank you for taking time to reply
 

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New dog blues. Sometimes called puppy blues. The initial excitement is over and the "OMG, what have I done?!" is setting in. Don't try and force a relationship with the dog. It will eventually develop into what it will be, whether that is polite coexistence, best buddies ever, or (more likely) something in between.

In our family, the dogs are "mine". I'm the one who brought them home. I'm the one who takes care of them. I'm the one who trains them. My husband will feed them if I can't, and on the rare occasions we walk together, will take one of them. Other than that, his relation ship with them is basically "oh hey, guy who pets us, could I please have some of your lunch?"
 
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Same here,

both of "my dogs" are family dogs.. both of "my cats" are the family cats. The family brought them home. but they all bonded to me, because I feed them, I walk them, I play with them.

If you want to build a relationship, insert yourself into your dogs life. Have some training sessions (training is a GREAT way to build a bond), Play with the dog, walk the dog. Some dogs love everybody, some dogs are a 1 person only sort of dog. Whatever happens will happen, and its ok.
 

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Hi.
My husband really wanted a dog for years and I am a cat person. When my beloved cat passed I agreed it would be a dog next. Few weeks ago I thought yes I am ready for a dog. We contacted resuce homes and found a springer dog. We spent nearly 2 weeks visiting him and getting to know him, it was fun and very active always being outdoors. I had vision's of a small dog to be honest but my husband was desperate for springer or beagle. So we got home and it was like I was hit with a brick of reality, its literally only been 2 days. However I have spent the whole time crying and hiding in our bedroom, my husband is already building a bond. Am giving myself terrible pressure, I am also off work which is out of routine so am just sitting round my house watching him and over thinking. I am desperate to make sure I have the best friend bond. Is it too early to even be thinking like this ? Am I a terrible person? All I see is the positive and everyone saying how amazing it is.....
Thank you for taking time to reply
Hi.

No. You're not a terrible person.

Breathe! Just . . . Breathe.

It's like having a child. You're in a sort of routine limbo - your old life and routine are gone and you haven't yet adjusted and got into another one.

My advice, is take the pressure off yourself. Training is a great way to bond, but in this case, structured training could become more like a chore (it certainly was with my second dog).

So, make training fun - make it a game.

Some games you can play include;

Hide and Seek:. Take it in turns with your partner to hold the dog while the other one hides. The hider calls the dog and the one holding releases him to find. Start around the house first, then, once he's reliable off leash, practice outside on walks.

Skill learned? Recall.

It's Yer Choice (by Susan Garret):. Sit on the floor with a handful of treats. When the dog leans in to take the food, close your fist. Dog leans back, you open your fist. Dog leans in, close fist. Dog leans away, open fist.

Eventually, the dog will pause before leaning forward, reassessing. This is what you've been waiting for. Use your other hand to offer him a treat. If he leans in for the rest, close fist again.

Once he starts to pause, begin to increase the duration - 1 second, 5 seconds. Feed treat.

Then make it harder by standing up, using your foot to protect the treats.

Skill learned? Impulse Control.

Find It: Scatter treats so he has to hunt for them. Start easy - drop hem a few feet away, and work up so that you hiding them all around the house and garden - and on walks. Then up the ante by asking him to find keys, gloves, socks, his toys, etc.

Skill learned? Fetch! But more importantly, he's engaging in natural behaviour which will stimulate his mind and tire him out.

The Bucket Game by Chirag Patel.

Remember you are human! Be kind to yourself. :)
 

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anything can be a game, if you make it a game, really.

the funnest training sessions are the ones where you just let loose, don't take it seriously, and just have fun!
 
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