Puppy Forum and Dog Forums banner

1 - 20 of 27 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,393 Posts
I do not let random people pet my puppy or my dog. Would we let random people pet or hold our babies? Probably not.
Advocate for your dog. Get him out and about to see different environments but don't let random people pet, hold, fondle, pick up or lean over your dog!

https://protect2.fireeye.com/url?k=...ukOrUJo2squw1RrmGK2zTI8fnbzU4Sbl9ns8BOpUYbAT8
I think you missed the author's main point, which was summarized concisely in the very last sentence of the article.

Or, at least this is how it should be for *most* dogs and dog owners. IPO competitors aside.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
75 Posts
One of my dogs actually IS anxious/reactive and honestly the comments...

- Why can't I pet him?
- He looks friendly to me.
- Well, if your dog isn't friendly he shouldn't be out in public!
- Come on, that dog is a mean one!

Anymore, I prefer to walk with someone else who can walk my non-reactive, super-social girl, so when someone asks if they can pet my dog (at least they asked!!) I can point to Sophie and say, "yes, you can pet her" while me and Chisum keep walking.

It's just...when I'm out in public with my dog, my responsibility is my dog. I will absolutely keep him at a distance that he feels safe, and I will absolutely keep him leashed and under control so the public is safe. But just because he is in public doesn't mean you can touch him! I hate seeing those videos of individuals with service dogs trying to explain to random, irate people why they can't touch their working dog. Really, it doesn't matter if it is a service dog or not - if the owner/handler says no, it means no.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
8,384 Posts
this is why if you have a dog that barks out and lunges you should let him do it, and not punish them for it. Focus on your dog and your management skills and your OB skills on how to handle a situation that other idiot people force you into. Owners get so wrapped up in trying to save the stupid idiot public individuals. You forget to be the one to help your dog, to be the one person he can count on to have your dogs back..

Myself and Darien in line at Pets mart he's being delightful and perfect, (6 years of training in this dog) people in front of us and Behind us. Couple in front of us are turned around and we are talking and laughing, they have a puppy in their arms.. Darien is sitting at my side in heal.. We had notice the obnoxious parentless kids running up and down screaming and laughing . At some point they see Darien and start running and scream with their arms all out , at him .. Darien stopped that crap about 15 to 10ft from him lunging and letting loose verbally on them. The kids stopped wrapped their arms back to their chest in total shocked and like or did started bawling.. I just said did he scare you... good.. now you know how he feels..

Only people that were offended were the idiot bawling kids and their idiot parents not brave enough to walk towards me with Darien at my side being quiet again sitting in heel position.. Everyone else thought Darien was a hero.... to finally be done with those kids. No doubt for the rest of those kids and parents lives they will remember Darien and even have mental issues.. Good.. they not think it so easy to terrorize other peoples dogs just because they in public... Other Adults had tried to talk to these kids before hand...
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,796 Posts
Discussion Starter · #5 ·
I think you missed the author's main point, which was summarized concisely in the very last sentence of the article.

Or, at least this is how it should be for *most* dogs and dog owners. IPO competitors aside.
I think the point was that you need to "read your dog" and know that the dog understands you are not going to let every stranger out there "hug the puppy." IPO competitors have dogs that can be handled and be petted (in fact they must tolerate a certain degree of this and it is tested in the Bh). The dogs usually prefer not (but not always).

I think it is extremely important NOT to allow every stranger out there to pet a puppy. It can be overwhelming and, instead, the owner should let the puppy know they are going to protect that baby dog. Can make a huge difference in the dog and handler or owner relationship, can reduce reactivity and lets the dog know they don't have to handle it.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
17,925 Posts
I think you missed the author's main point, which was summarized concisely in the very last sentence of the article.

Or, at least this is how it should be for *most* dogs and dog owners. IPO competitors aside.
THIS, at least as far as I'm concerned.

People regularly ask me if they can pet my dogs. My response, these days and for the last year, is "I don't know, ask them."

This confuses the crap out of them but my dogs can decide to interact - or not. Overwhelmingly they decide to not. That's cool, but the offer is there should they want it.

And it's spreading because I used to get baffled looks and have to explain what I meant. Not so much these days.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,796 Posts
Discussion Starter · #8 ·
THIS, at least as far as I'm concerned.

People regularly ask me if they can pet my dogs. My response, these days and for the last year, is "I don't know, ask them."

This confuses the crap out of them but my dogs can decide to interact - or not. Overwhelmingly they decide to not. That's cool, but the offer is there should they want it.

And it's spreading because I used to get baffled looks and have to explain what I meant. Not so much these days.
Actually have someone else who says, "He would rather not." This also confuses people (but there are some who keep on coming and then they are told not to in no uncertain terms).

I say No. My dog would be fine but why?

I say No for one additional reason. If my dog does a single thing "untoward" (such as a friendly poke at someone with a foot and scratch them) it could turn into something less positive. NY.. land or Lawyers and Law Suits and a German Shepherd dog.. and suddenly I am reported as having a "dangerous dog" (which he is most assuredly NOT). Golden Retrievers get a pass.. my breed? Not so much.

I would rather be thought rude than go through that nonsense with some unknown person (but my first reason for saying No is I advocate for my dog).

I never understood this need by JQ Public to pet strange dogs. If they want a dog to pet, they can get their own dog.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
75 Posts
THIS, at least as far as I'm concerned.

People regularly ask me if they can pet my dogs. My response, these days and for the last year, is "I don't know, ask them."

This confuses the crap out of them but my dogs can decide to interact - or not. Overwhelmingly they decide to not. That's cool, but the offer is there should they want it.

And it's spreading because I used to get baffled looks and have to explain what I meant. Not so much these days.
I would love to be able to do this, however, I would not consider my reactive boy to be subtle when it comes to "please get away from me" and still people think he's friendly.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,728 Posts
Ever since Bonnie was attacked by another dog, she started growling at strange dogs if they came too near her. I have never corrected (if that is the right word for it) but have walked her away. She has started doing it less and less as she realizes I am not going to let them near her. She has gradually been letting them get nearer to her before she gets uncomfortable. As I do Agility with her and she loves to do it she is slowly starting to ignore the other dogs while she is in the ring. She is fine with people but is the sort of dog that does not seek out pats from strangers, just ignores them.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
17,925 Posts
I would love to be able to do this, however, I would not consider my reactive boy to be subtle when it comes to "please get away from me" and still people think he's friendly.
Yeah, the answer with my reactive dog for many years was 'no', because people are stupid. These days she's more subtle, but she also was helped enormously by me being rude and doing her yelling for her - and learning to park herself between my legs while I did.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
17,925 Posts
Actually have someone else who says, "He would rather not." This also confuses people (but there are some who keep on coming and then they are told not to in no uncertain terms).

I say No. My dog would be fine but why?

I say No for one additional reason. If my dog does a single thing "untoward" (such as a friendly poke at someone with a foot and scratch them) it could turn into something less positive. NY.. land or Lawyers and Law Suits and a German Shepherd dog.. and suddenly I am reported as having a "dangerous dog" (which he is most assuredly NOT). Golden Retrievers get a pass.. my breed? Not so much.

I would rather be thought rude than go through that nonsense with some unknown person (but my first reason for saying No is I advocate for my dog).

I never understood this need by JQ Public to pet strange dogs. If they want a dog to pet, they can get their own dog.
I don't get it either, and am free in saying 'no' if I"m otherwise busy or just don't feel like it because I am not the most social person. But if I have time and the dog is interested? Sure, go ahead. They're not going to jump on, poke, or scratch anyone. Mostly they're going to sit, get pet for a second and wander off (they're not exuberantly friendly, either). If it's a kid I kneel down with my dog (whichever one) to supervise more closely than the parents.

Also, frankly speaking, my dogs attend MANY performance events that people attend as spectators because the y're interested in the sport and/or the dogs. Having dogs there who can act as good ambassadors gives them a more positive experience, teaches them a thing or two, and increases the odds they'll show up in the future as competitors or will even jump in and volunteer at the event that's going on now (moving equipment, leash running, carrying score sheets to the secretary, in the ring setting bars - basic stuff). But mostly I think that being a welcoming committee at those events rather than being standoffish or rude is an important thing we do for the community. If my dogs don't want to be pet, sure, they won't be and i'll be the welcoming committee on my own - but if the dog is interested, the dog can participate in that, too, and add a little more to the positive impression. And, hey, if they don't I give a FRIENDLY 2 second educational blip on how you can tell the dog isn't into it right now and move on.

Dog sports are going to DIE if we keep being elite and holier than thou rather than welcoming new, even very green and not dogsavvy people, in .
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,796 Posts
Discussion Starter · #13 ·
I don't get it either, and am free in saying 'no' if I"m otherwise busy or just don't feel like it because I am not the most social person. But if I have time and the dog is interested? Sure, go ahead. They're not going to jump on, poke, or scratch anyone. Mostly they're going to sit, get pet for a second and wander off (they're not exuberantly friendly, either). If it's a kid I kneel down with my dog (whichever one) to supervise more closely than the parents.

Also, frankly speaking, my dogs attend MANY performance events that people attend as spectators because the y're interested in the sport and/or the dogs. Having dogs there who can act as good ambassadors gives them a more positive experience, teaches them a thing or two, and increases the odds they'll show up in the future as competitors or will even jump in and volunteer at the event that's going on now (moving equipment, leash running, carrying score sheets to the secretary, in the ring setting bars - basic stuff). But mostly I think that being a welcoming committee at those events rather than being standoffish or rude is an important thing we do for the community. If my dogs don't want to be pet, sure, they won't be and i'll be the welcoming committee on my own - but if the dog is interested, the dog can participate in that, too, and add a little more to the positive impression. And, hey, if they don't I give a FRIENDLY 2 second educational blip on how you can tell the dog isn't into it right now and move on.

Dog sports are going to DIE if we keep being elite and holier than thou rather than welcoming new, even very green and not dogsavvy people, in .
At events (and I have not attended an agility trial in years) I leave my dog in the truck or trailer (crated) unless we are checking in with the judge, competing or I am walking the dog for a break/potty. The dogs (and this is pretty universal at IGP events) are not wandering on leash with handler among the spectators. The only dogs are those on the field and those waiting to go (usually away from the spectators). Sometimes, during the Obedience phase, someone may be out among spectators with a puppy and, if the puppy approaches then petting can happen, of course.

Even when I go to an obedience match or show and go where most people put dogs in crates in a room or around the ring, I leave my dog in the truck until it is our turn in the ring. I do this because it is so much easier for me and for no other reason (he is not reactive at all and is the most balanced dog I have ever had).

I am always friendly and welcoming at events... but my dog is in the truck or trailer.

With all the Animal Rights Clap Trap we all need to be welcoming at events or there will be no events (absolutely). We also are inviting to people who want to watch us train on club training days.

My rude NO you cannot pet my dog happens when I am taking a walk or doing something else like socializing a puppy or "whatever" and my dog is with me.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,393 Posts
I let random people "pet" my dog at virtually every obedience trial I am entered in. Ie: the judge, during SFE ex in Novice and Moving Stand ex in Utility.

So, to that end, I think it's only wise to discerningly allow "random people" to pet my dog for preparation / training purposes [keyword = DISCERNINGLY].

And, I am happy to report that my dogs have suffered no negative consequences whatsoever as a result.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,393 Posts
I think that some competitors can be over-zealous and misguided in their efforts to prevent reinforcement that comes from outside sources.

Like ... *I am my dog's SOLE source of reinforcement*. So don't go near him, and for gawd's sake certainly don't pet him. Believing that prevention or deprivation will somehow net the person a better score and a more reliable performance during a trial.

Not much truth to it, really. And sometimes, it just gets carried WAY too far.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
17,925 Posts
Look, I am one of the more hardcore 'my dogs do not exist for your public amusement/we are not a roaming petting zoo' people out there.

But I have come to appreciate very much two things, that have softened my stance:
1-) With kids in particular, but also the world at large, I want to reward the people who ASK. Because some people? Don't ask. Those people don't get to pet. The people who do ask? If I am not with a dog who does not want to be pet, or otherwise busy, they may pet my dog and thank you for asking.

2-) It builds my dogs confidence in the world for situations where they are GOING to be touched by people - like the vet or vet techs. At some point no one but me or family or people they know well petting them, they are going to get sketchy and find the e-vet they've never seen needing to handle them bad. I'd rather they not.

And

3-) Yes, what pet peeve just posted as I was posting: A million times yes. If your engagement and reinforcement history do not hold up under some petting at erratic intervals you're doing something wrong. Sure, if you ALWAYS have EVERYONE they see pet the dog or feed the dog or you have a super people loving dog you might hit an issue. That's why I'm discerning and it's SOMETIMES not ALL THE TIME - it's also why my dogs are the breeds I have, not labs and goldens. They still prefer to work with me over seeking reinforcement from the environment.

I had Kiran out at a 100s of vendors, 1000s of people (literally) county wide yard sale this last weekend. You know who he interacted with or acknowledged? The three people who asked if they could pet him, and I told him he could go see. Otherwise, he was glued to my hip, often offering heeling and staring in my face because that's fun for him.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
17,925 Posts
I think that some competitors can be over-zealous and misguided in their efforts to prevent reinforcement that comes from outside sources.

Like ... *I am my dog's SOLE source of reinforcement*. So don't go near him, and for gawd's sake certainly don't pet him. Believing that prevention or deprivation will somehow net the person a better score and a more reliable performance during a trial.

Not much truth to it, really. And sometimes, it just gets carried WAY too far.
Yeah. I mean I prefer my dogs be somewhat aloof temperamentally, but I want them confident and happy and frankly if your reward history doesn't stand up to some occasional petting, or even treating and playing with, by other people you've got some ISSUES.

OTOH, a lot of times people who take it THAT far are not bothering with building reward history anyway, so much as trying to punish out disengagement which is stupid and a nice way to create displacement and avoidance which is DISENGAGEMENT ANYWAY.

So counter productive.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
17,925 Posts
AND COME TO THAT:

My BC shares agility lessons (otherwise private) off leash with a dog owned by a friend. She regularly plays off leash with the dog, and sees, is pet by, and plays with (and adores) the dog's owner. She also gets treated and petted by the instructor regularly and adores her.

Guess how many times I've had her blowing me off during those lessons to go play with the other dog or person? Or how often the other dog does?

Zero.

Absolutely. Zero.

Over years of doing this weekly.

AND THE OTHER DOG IS A LAB.

(Never mind the ring crew and bar setters and judge in the ring that even the most social baby dog doesn't greet because he's busy with me).
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,393 Posts
I never understood this need by JQ Public to pet strange dogs. If they want a dog to pet, they can get their own dog.
Admiration. It's a large, integral part of the human condition.

I've learned to embrace it, mostly. And always discerningly of course.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
17,925 Posts
Admiration. It's a large, integral part of the human condition.

I've learned to embrace it, mostly. And always discerningly of course.
you know what I get requests for a lot, lately?

Photographs.

That one I find weird.

I still go along with it pretty often, since often the people who want to pet and/or photograph are college kids who miss their own dogs.

Or old farmers who want to wax poetic about the old dog they had that Kiran reminds them of.

It's *SWEET*.
 
1 - 20 of 27 Posts
Top