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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
Hi - my girlfriend and I went separate ways almost 2 months ago. We got a puppy when he was 10 weeks and is now almost 10 months. She moved away back home and Ajay (dog) is with me and staying with me. Ex gf wants to come and take him for a week back to her house...

He is a mini Australian shepherd.

Ajay has become pretty much my sidekick - he goes to work, errands, dog park, pretty much everywhere with me and we're finally in a rhythm that works for us.

I have been told by a few trainers that these situation generally cause the dog a lot of stress and can be very hurtful if not treated right.

Will this have an affect on his behavior? What is the best thing to do in this situation?

She doesn't want to do anything that will cause him any more stress than has already endured....

Thanks for your help - all comments are appreciated.
 

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It largely depends on his temperament on how he will deal with this and how it will affect him in future.

The more highly strung, the more it will affect his psyche.
 

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I wouldn't do it. I think you need to get her to give him to you 100%. Otherwise you will be forever tied to her. Plus, what happens if she doesn't want to return him? Or if he gets out and gets hit by a car. Will she pay the vet bills?
If she wants a dog, have her go get her own, and she can be responsible for it.
 

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I wouldn't do it. I think you need to get her to give him to you 100%. Otherwise you will be forever tied to her. Plus, what happens if she doesn't want to return him? Or if he gets out and gets hit by a car. Will she pay the vet bills?
If she wants a dog, have her go get her own, and she can be responsible for it.
i agree with nikes, however if you decide to have "split custody" of ajay, come up with an agreement, run it by her, have it notarized and signed.

another concern i would have is training - you already have a rhythm with ajay, and she probably has her own idea of how he should be trained, which will cause confusion and i'm sure it could to lead to stress. what about people she associates with; are they going to treat him right?

lastly, can you trust her to return him?

good luck with your predicament.
 

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MY 'way" may be cold & hard....but,..I have been down this road w/actual human children....I think that a very FEW vast full of humans can "co-own" a dog...(&..I don't even begin to include the show dogs here...that is WAY different)..anyhow, back on topic...unless this is something that YOU want to persue for personal reasons...I think that it is a HORRIBLE idea to "share" the dog at this time or that...dogs need routines..as do human children...when strange variants come into play...so do odd, unenexplained behaviors. IF you trust your EX to follow YOUR schedule confinements...(like no take-out leftovers..going potty outside 100% of the time)...I would MAYBE consider it, but,..in reality..everyone has their "own idea" of how dogs CAN be raised!!
Were I to find myself in this situation tommorrow...I would NOT say that I would trust another w/my dog...based on how I have trained him, &, how I want his training to continue....Luck to you!! :)
 

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Interestingly, I took the meaning of the OPs query to be centred on how the pooch would handle the arrangement, not if it should be done or not.
 

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Well, if she is considerate enough to not want to cause the dog stress, that's very positive.

Does SHE feel this would be stressful for the dog based on having co-owned him for several months?
Does the dog like her? Did she spend as much or more time with him when you two were together or was he more your dog?
How far away is "back home"? (long car ride, plane, etc)? Is the dog a good traveler or does this stress him out?
What is her situation at home? Is she going to take him for a week and then leave him while she goes to work for 8 hours a day?
Are there any health concerns where she lives that are not where you live (ie heartworm, lyme, etc)?
Does Ajay have separation anxiety issues now or has he had them in the past 10 months?
 

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Lots to consider that's already been posted! I think if he's used to both of you, you may want to work something out. But, get it in writing or be aware of the risks (vet bills etc...) and how that would be handled.

And relationship wise, I'm not sure how I'd feel about dating a guy who is 'linked' to an ex because of a dog. Just seems strange to me, but it depends on the situation.

Lana
 
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