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Okay,

So here's my issue with my dog. She knows she needs to go outside to do her business and knows that doing it inside is wrong etc. So in a way, she is potty trained because whenever people are around and she's sniffing and looking for a spot to pee or poop, she'll stop and whine and wait for you to take her out when you yell at her "No". My problem is that whenever i am not around, she does not hold it in and come to me whenever she needs to go outside. I need to teach her to hold it in and to let me know when she needs to go. Cause she just goes inside the house whenever she is not supervised knowing it's wrong. Why? We have a backyard and the other two dogs hold it in just fine and lets me know and they go. But she doesn't go unless i am there to tell her not to go on the carpet. She only reminds me when i call her name. She'll whine and rub her feet on the carpet/floor letting me know she needs to go. Idk what to do with her. My fiance tells me i am suppose to be strong with her and whenever she goes inside the house, put her nose or show her the spot and spank her and say "No". He say's eventually she will learn. But i feel terrible doing that. Any advice? I'd appreciate it. Thanks!
 

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Do not spank or rub her nose in it! PLEASE! That's cruel! It's a very old school, outdated technique. Also, don't yell! It's possible that she's not really potty trained all that well. If you trained her by yelling at her, "No" she may not be making the connection that pee/poop is done outside. What she may have gotten out of it is that when you yell she has to go out, she may have missed the connection to peeing and pooping.
Also, some dogs freeze up when they are startled, so if you yell when she acts like she has to go, she may forget what she was doing, and if she forgets that she was about to pee/poop, then she's once again, not making the connection about going to the bathroom outside.

Has she been checked by a vet? She could have some issues with her plumbing. If she's health, I think you need to go back to potty training basics and try again.
 

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"Being strong" with her won't help. Some dogs just don't ask to go outside.

I have one who is good at letting me know and another who has let me know maybe five times since I got him nearly two years ago. The best solution is to let her out on a schedule. Every two or three hours (depending on her size--how big is she?), give her the opportunity to go out. This is much better than having to clean up afterward. :)

And yes, it is a good idea to have her checked by the vet to rule out any medical cause.
 

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Okay,

So here's my issue with my dog. She knows she needs to go outside to do her business and knows that doing it inside is wrong etc. So in a way, she is potty trained because whenever people are around and she's sniffing and looking for a spot to pee or poop, she'll stop and whine and wait for you to take her out when you yell at her "No". My problem is that whenever i am not around, she does not hold it in and come to me whenever she needs to go outside. I need to teach her to hold it in and to let me know when she needs to go. Cause she just goes inside the house whenever she is not supervised knowing it's wrong. Why? We have a backyard and the other two dogs hold it in just fine and lets me know and they go. But she doesn't go unless i am there to tell her not to go on the carpet. She only reminds me when i call her name. She'll whine and rub her feet on the carpet/floor letting me know she needs to go. Idk what to do with her. My fiance tells me i am suppose to be strong with her and whenever she goes inside the house, put her nose or show her the spot and spank her and say "No". He say's eventually she will learn. But i feel terrible doing that. Any advice? I'd appreciate it. Thanks!
The dog does not "know it is wrong." What the dog knows is that people freak out and scold her when she poops. That's why she does it when no one is around. It should be obvious that rubbing her nose in it or spanking her, besides being unsanitary, disgusting, and cruel, would only make matters worse. When she goes inside, just clean it up and treat the area with stuff that will kill the odor. It's available at pet stores and on Amazon.

I went through this with a two-year-old rescue dog that was afraid to go when people were around (Zoot, the gray one pictured below). Maybe his previous owner was your fiance. :)

What you must do is praise and reward the dog for going where you want her to. I devoted a three-day weekend to waiting it out in the back yard. Zoot was afraid to go in my presence even outside, so I was a little sneaky. He was afraid even after he finished, so at first I threw the treats to him - big chunks of hotdog. Eventually he would run happily to the designated area to poop, and come bounding back to me after he finished to receive his treat. The treats are no longer necessary. He hasn't had an accident in months, and the last time was because he was sick.
 

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The dog does not "know it is wrong." What the dog knows is that people freak out and scold her when she poops. That's why she does it when no one is around. It should be obvious that rubbing her nose in it or spanking her, besides being unsanitary, disgusting, and cruel, would only make matters worse. When she goes inside, just clean it up and treat the area with stuff that will kill the odor. It's available at pet stores and on Amazon.

I went through this with a two-year-old rescue dog that was afraid to go when people were around (Zoot, the gray one pictured below). Maybe his previous owner was your fiance. :)

What you must do is praise and reward the dog for going where you want her to. I devoted a three-day weekend to waiting it out in the back yard. Zoot was afraid to go in my presence even outside, so I was a little sneaky. He was afraid even after he finished, so at first I threw the treats to him - big chunks of hotdog. Eventually he would run happily to the designated area to poop, and come bounding back to me after he finished to receive his treat. The treats are no longer necessary. He hasn't had an accident in months, and the last time was because he was sick.
So even if i just call her name out whenever she is sniffing and looking for a spot she does not know it is wrong? I mean, I take it that she knows because she stops as soon as I call her and begins whining, rubbing her feet on the carpet, and jumping on me to let her out. Then she sits there and waits for me to put my shoes on and look for the leash. So if she does not know it's wrong. Why does she behave that way when i call her name? What does this particular behavior mean? Because she only behaves this way and lets me know when i call her name. Just seems odd that she doesn't know yet behaves like every other dog who needs to go outside.
 

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So even if i just call her name out whenever she is sniffing and looking for a spot she does not know it is wrong? I mean, I take it that she knows because she stops as soon as I call her and begins whining, rubbing her feet on the carpet, and jumping on me to let her out. Then she sits there and waits for me to put my shoes on and look for the leash. So if she does not know it's wrong. Why does she behave that way when i call her name? What does this particular behavior mean? Because she only behaves this way and lets me know when i call her name. Just seems odd that she doesn't know yet behaves like every other dog who needs to go outside.
To a dog, "right" means something good (for her) is happening or is expected; "Wrong" means something bad is happening or is expected. She starts expecting something bad to happen when you call her. When you catch her sniffing around, do not call her. Go to her and just take her outside immediately. Be cheerful about it. Once outside, give her plenty of space until she does her duty. Wait her out. Then give her treats and lavish praise.

I would also suggest strongly that you give the dog a new name. When you say the name, it should mean, "If you pay attention to me, something good will happen for you."
 

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So even if i just call her name out whenever she is sniffing and looking for a spot she does not know it is wrong? I mean, I take it that she knows because she stops as soon as I call her and begins whining, rubbing her feet on the carpet, and jumping on me to let her out. Then she sits there and waits for me to put my shoes on and look for the leash. So if she does not know it's wrong. Why does she behave that way when i call her name? What does this particular behavior mean? Because she only behaves this way and lets me know when i call her name. Just seems odd that she doesn't know yet behaves like every other dog who needs to go outside.
Calling her name means nothing to her other than you're calling for her attention. I never confuse the dogs names with their commands. Even when I want them to come to me I use "in" as a command. Knowing her name and responding to it does not really have much to do with right or wrong. Dogs are not capable of distinguishing when they've done something right or wrong. My dogs are praised for doing "right" but they don't learn that action is right- just that something good comes from it happening.
I have a nearly 5 year old dog that will go in the house. Normally I would advice people with such a dog to go back to potty training 101, but he IS house trained. When he has to go he goes into our kitchen and begins sniffing around but not asking to go out- I just know this is a sign he has to go. I then ask him if he has to go potty and he raises his little ears and runs for the back door. However, if I'm sleeping or not home and he did not go out (at night I literally have to walk him outside because he won't go out otherwise) he will just go in the house. The only way I can combat this is keeping him perfectly on schedule. For you, I would suggest crating when you're not home along with the strict schedule.

Like Thracian said, some dogs just don't ask. Magpie and Jack never ask to go outside. They go out when the door opens. Jack will pace and MAYBE whine if he really has to go, but otherwise they just rely on us to let them out on a schedule.
 

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I have two dogs in the house: one is a small shihtzupoo and the other is a tad bit overweight lab. My lab is completely house broken and was before I got her. When she has to go outside, she just lays around and mopes. However, if I get up and pay attention to her, she starts to jump around and go nuts. She doesn't do anything fantastical to let me know she has to go in the first place.... its only when I pay attention to her that she shows me her needs.
My little dog took FOREVER to house break and he's still not completely house broken. He will "dance" and his tail will curl tightly when he has to poop. I have to watch for those signs, otherwise, he WILL relieve himself indoors when I am not looking. It's frustrating because he is four and still doesn't quite get it, BUT he is getting there. I had to go back to basics. I am now crate training him and the biggest thing ( most obvious that I never though of) was what goes in must come out.
Since my older dog is house trained, I was just leaving her food and water out. It didn't matter how much she ate or drank- because she would hold it. A ten lb shihtzu poo holding it? Good luck with that.
The dogs are fed on schedule and then the food removed. The water stays. The shihtzu poo is crated, and taken out at the same exact time every day. He only gets free time if he actually potties outside.
Its working like a charm.
 

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The trick is for some small dogs (I have pugs and this works well) is just letting them out on a schedule, like every 4 hours if you are home, don't make them wait until they are signaling that they need to go out, just let the dogs out on a schedule.

When you yell or give your dog a native reaction to going in the house when you are home they ONLY learn that its bad to go in the house when you are home, because nothing happens when you are away right? So you need to crate or confine the dog when you are not their and reward the dog highly when they DO make the right choice to go outside. I always tell people to cook up some chicken breast and give the dog a tiny piece when they go outside along with lots of praise.... give the dog the chicken ONLY when they go to the bathroom outside and for no other reason. Once she equates the chicken to the outside bathroom time she will be begging to go to the bathroom outside so she can have a piece of chicken.

ignore or prevent inside accidents and HIGHLY reward outside bathroom breaks, which means you need to go with your dog outside and watch what is going on and be prepared with a reward when they do something desired.

ETA that your dog may even be holding it until you leave the house to avoid the yelling, so I would cut any negative association with going in the house and revert to only positive when the dog does the desired behavior.

i have pugs which is a breed famous for being difficult in this area, now that they are house broken I vary the treats to keep them motivated, meaning if we have something good for dinner and there is something left over (chicken, pork, beef, cheese and sometimes just bread) i will wait for them to go outside and just randomly give them a big reward, it keeps them interested and on the right track.
 
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