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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Is it wrong to get another dog soon after a loss? I miss the companionship of my old dog? I don'[t want to replace the personality of the one that passed, just miss having a dog around to take care of and love.
 

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Of course it's not wrong. You know what they say about people who have happy marriages marrying again soon after they lose a spouse - because they experienced happiness in a relationship and want it again. True here too. I'm one of those who mourns, and I did without after the death of each dog way too long, which is why I got a second dog some years ago. There's an age gap, and my theory is this way I'll never be dogless again.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Thanks, I waited 3 years with the last one which is the one we put down after almost 16 years. She was just a puppy at the time when we got her. I told myself back then 3 years was way too long between dogs, for me it was, and thanks for your response, it makes me feel hopeful that I can smile again?.
 

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I don't think there is anything to be gained by observing some mandatory period of mourning after the loss if a well-loved dog.

There IS an advantage to doing your research and avoiding impulsive decisions.

Personally, I've avoided getting a dog that is too similar to the one I've lost. I would be too tempted to make comparisons that are unfair to both dogs. But that's just me.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
No, I would be looking at several breeds to see which is best for me. As for comparisons, I learned my lesson years ago when I tried to replace my first dog, uh uh, it was totally opposite, The breeder showed us the supposed mother which was almost a complete match for the dog I lost, and I fell for that, but the puppies didn't turn out anything like her? Now I am wiser for it, what you see is not always what you get?
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Is it selfish of me to miss the companionship and get a dog for that reason?. It seems like so much that I look at is a reminder of my dear old girl and I want that to be again, not with her but with another dog.
 

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1. When ppl tell me that "it is almost time", the last recommendation I give them is to start looking for a new dog Now!
I try to be a bit more diplomatic, but that cuts to the chase. I waited 2 weeks for my previous two dogs (separately).
2. Rationale - Why wait, once you have looked after your old dog, no reason to waste that "unfulfilled love". In addition, it may take a year or so of mourning and grief, whether you have a new dog or not. But, we've found that having a new dog forces you through the mandatory grieving process faster, with minimal wallowing, isolation, and loneliness. I did compare the new dog to the old dog, and I did call the new dog by the old dog's name occasionally, but after about a year, the old dog was a pleasant memory, and the new dog was my companion.
3. Training is usually easier with the new dog, b/c you're fresh on what to expect. The dog may not learn faster, but you should be more patient, or at least less frustrated. ;-)
4. Issue - Use the dog to get back with friends and neighbors, and dog play dates. Don't use the dog as an excuse to withdraw from people, or as your only companion. You need to interact with people, and [Ian Dunbar and Turid Rugaas, and others] recommend that a dog is happier with at least one interaction with other, known and friendly dogs every week, more if possible [ This does not mean random interaction with unknown dogs at a dog park ... But, we do have a neighborhood dog park where a group of us meet at a certain time ... I don't attend a public dog park.]
5. As long as you give your dog food, shelter, exercise, love, care, and training ... I don't think it matters whether you get a dog as an alarm, a companion, an exercise partner, or a way to make friends.
6. I spent many decades determining that I like a Lab x GSD mix, that was the 'breed' of my first two dogs, and it has been the breed of my previous two dogs. I have no problem with extreme comparison b/c of breed similarity. Feel free to get the breed of your choice.
7. Many ppl prefer to adopt an adult rescue, to avoid dealing with the puppy issues. I like the puppy issues, but my current dog was 1.5yo when I bought him from a rescue. They had him his entire life, and he was 70lb and fearful. He's now 80lbs, sweet, beautiful, and an accomplished therapy dog. But, it took 2 - 3 years of me rehabilitating him, and I still can't use him where there are unfriendly dogs [friendly dogs are fine] or energetic young kids [he barks if they run at him - harmless but very loud]. The therapy trainers suggest another year or two for running kids, but he may never be calm around unfriendly dogs [at least he doesn't try to eat off leash little dogs that rush him... ;-) ]. My previous puppies learned to deal with these issues when they were young.
8. Although I've always adopted a stray or rescue, I sometimes recommend getting a dog from a good breeder, especially if you can get a 12-week puppy or older that has been potty trained, socialized, and trained a little. I've seen friends buy 'older' Lab and Golden puppies, and they were dream puppies, that seemed as settled as my puppies after they were 6 mos old. True, some of the Goldens and Labs were still high energy, but they seemed more relaxed with the world.

Go get your dog!!! And post lotsa pix!
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Thank you hanksimon and other posters for your encouraging posts. My husband and I have decided we are going to get another dog or puppy. We were thinking the same thing is that it will helps us through the grieving as well. We are still working on what breed to get. Hanksimon your dog sounds naturally loveable, LoL, does he share and give hugs?
 

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Hanksimon your dog sounds naturally loveable, LoL, does he share and give hugs?
He is a sweet 'teddy bear' and whines like a puppy when he sees his human friends. He's a BIG lap dog, and leans on people when they pet him. He is absolutely non-aggressive with people, is not resource aggressive ... so, except for playing, he doesn't react if you want his toy or food. In fact, he seems to like physical attention, petting etc., while he's eating! He's not always so accommodating with other dogs, but it seems more like an empty threat, and he does tease other dogs but pushing a toy into their face, then running. So, yes, he does share, but doesn't hug. [Again, he's an 80lb dog, so I have to be careful that he doesn't jump up, lean too hard, and even watch where he wags his baseball bat tail.] That is his picture as my profile/avatar.
 

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Is it wrong to get another dog soon after a loss? I miss the companionship of my old dog? I don'[t want to replace the personality of the one that passed, just miss having a dog around to take care of and love.
Not at all. We lost our "almost eleven" year old in November. It was a quick illness and we were very upset (still are). I did start looking for another dog within days of her dying. We do have a fourteen year old dog but the one who died was our walking companion. The fourteen year old can not hear or see so she doesn't go on walks. Anyway, we waited to even take walks without her. Found out a pup we want was born two days after our deceased dog's birthday. I am taking that as a sign (I hope) We plan to pick up the new one next month. Cross fingers and hope she is a good dog.
 

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Is it wrong to get another dog soon after a loss? I miss the companionship of my old dog? I don'[t want to replace the personality of the one that passed, just miss having a dog around to take care of and love.
I became a foster, rescue groups save pound dogs on the kill list from being killed & they ask for people to help, you mind them till they're adopted out BUT if you fall in love with them then you have 1st choice to adopt them that's how I ended up with my Patch.
I would go to the local pound & see which dogs I was drawn too, then I'd find out when will they be put to sleep then I'd contact my rescue group & get them to save the dog.
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
Snuggles, I am so happy for you, and yes I wish you many many healthy happy years with your new puppy dog. I can't wait to see or hear of your new fur baby.

Sueang, we will be looking in the Pound and No kill Shelters and also the ones posted on line and for sale privately, he's got to be out there somewhere, and I also hope we pick up one that fits in our family. A friend of mine use to work for one of these Shelters, they mainly have big dogs, but I may call her up and ask her to keep an eye out for a smaller dog.
 

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Not at all!
Everyone is different. Some people can't get another dog for a long time, others get one before they lose their older dog.
We lost a dog to cancer on Presidents Day 5 years ago. (a Monday) We had talked about it and decided we would wait a few months and get an older male puppy (we still had 2 dogs). The following Sunday, we had a new 10 week old female puppy. Not quite what we'd planned. She's a unique "little" dog. Doesn't like most other dogs, is scared of most people, but LOVES her inner circle of friends and agility. She's been a challenge, and a learning experience, but she needed us.

Do what's right for you.
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
First of all I'm sorry for your loss. You are right, it is different for different people. It's been one week today, at times it seems longer than that, at other times it seems like yesterday. I still shed tears for her, not as many as in the first couple of days, but they are still there. I want to be really sure another one is what we want? I may give it a few weeks just to make sure.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
Just feeling a little down today. I am still upset but it's getting easier. I still haven't found another dog yet? I want to, but figured first I would take care of a health issue, and now is tax time and would like to get that out of the way first so I can give full attention to a new dog when it comes?. I would like to get a light colored small to medium labradoodle, but I don't think that will happen, as they are so expensive in our area that it's out of reach and will have to remain my dream dog? Even the other smaller dogs are expensive and to that cost add vet checks, shots and neutering . I've been keeping an eye out on line in the shelters which are very reasonable, but they are almost all big dogs around here, but I can't have a big dog? Don't know what to think or do?
 

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Whenever we have lost a dog we have said 'if its supposed to be another one will come into our lives' somehow we have always known when its time..
Murphy is the first dog Ive ever actually chosen. All the rest have been dogs who needed us at that time but it didnt stop them being the most wonderful dogs and looking back yes our perfect dream dogs.
Maybe its time to visit a few shelters or email rescues and explain you cant take a big dog but are willing to be put on their waiting list for a smaller dog.
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
You are right, one of my most loyal dog was a Shelter dog. He was the next best thing to a dream dog. My sister seen the skinny dog when we brought him home from the Shelter, and told me to take the scrawny thing back. He wouldn't eat and his coat was so thin, could see thru to his skin.. I took him to the Vet to ask their advice because I was afraid he would die on me. . They told me his natural eating instincts would kick in when he knew he had to eat to survive, and they told me to keep him because he was a nice dog. I took their advice and kept him and he did eat and was a beautiful dog He became a loving and a full furred family member and grew up with the kids and lived till he was 16 years. Just say he was the right fit for our family. He is a part of my most favorite memories. Guess we were just lucky to find him. I know we will never find another like him, but hopefully our next dog will be equally as loyal and loving.

My husband and I plan on going in a couple of weeks or so? First we will hit the Shelters and Pet Adoption centers and go from there I think when we put our mind to it, we will just do it, we really don't want to be put on a waiting list, but we will see. We will give Shelters a try first. Wish us luck. LoL, I know I've been saying that for a while, but one day it will happen.
 
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