Puppy Forum and Dog Forums banner

ISO: Advice on adopting after recent losses

5040 Views 62 Replies 11 Participants Last post by  PatriciafromCO
So, I realize this is an intensely personal question and only my husband and myself can make the best decision we can for us, but I could really use some advice or stories or anything helpful regarding adopting a new dog after yours dies.

Sebastian, the dog my husband and I adopted when we first moved in together, died on January 3rd, just a few months after my family dog from childhood died as well. Obviously, it's been a lot of loss in a short period of time. I have not lived in a house without a dog since I was 13 and I will be 30 next year. I hate being in a house without a dog even more than I thought I would (and it is a "house" without a dog, not a "home"). I hate it so much. I am so lonely without both of them. Further, I have serious and chronic health problems of my own... neither Bailey nor Sebastian were service animals, but I did not realize how much my health relied on them until they were gone. Or maybe the stress of their passing has thrown my system out of whack, which is also entirely possible.

Basically, I feel like I'm ready to start looking for our next family member. The idea that a new dog could in any way replace Bailey or Sebastian is absolutely unthinkable to me, so believe me that is not what this is. Or, that's certainly not what we want it to be, but I am also well aware that my husband and I are still very early in the grieving process for Sebastian and that we need to be cautious in our decision making. I think we are, though. We are keeping the lines of communication open with each other and when we browsed on Petfinder we sent an enquiry about ONE dog that looked like he'd fit our lives... not 100 questions about 100 animals that who knows if they'd work for us.

Anyway, I guess I'm just looking for stories about when you adopted after losing another pet. Did you do so quickly? Did it take years? Have you reached your last dog? I would also be extremely curious to hear from those who have fallen in love with specific breeds. Sebastian was Pyr mix and we are hoping for another mix or full bred Pyr, but want to be congnisant about not comparing him to Sebastian. At the same time, we know lots of people who will get the same breed over and over again. Bailey was my first dog from childhood and Sebastian was my first dog I adopted myself as an adult so this is the "first second dog" for everyone and we are all feeling a bit lost about it.

Any help would be greatly appreciated, while recognizing (again) that no one else can make this decision for us.

Thanks in advance.
See less See more
1 - 3 of 63 Posts
Today is my three labs birthday, Max I (deceased), Max II (deceased) and Sami, our present rescue. Max I was our first lab, 28 years ago. When we lost Max I at the age of almost 12 years old, we were devastated and waited a year before we rescued another lab. The day we rescued Max II was the day I stopped crying over Max I. Max II was a stray on the streets of NC with two bad hips. We rescued him, fixed both hips and he was the love of my life. We lost Max II three years ago this past November at the age of almost 13; he died from cancer. We said we were not going to get another pup, at least not right away. Two months later we rescued our Sami, a yellow lab (think mixed with Beagle). He is approximately five years old. We missed Max II so much and still do, and Sami just didn't compare to him and is not as affectionate. It was harder for my husband to warm up to him, but now three years later, Sami is our third love and we know he loves us. So, for me, I am glad we rescued right away; it does help the hurt. Everyone needs to follow their own heart, but if you are going to rescue, just think about that pup out there waiting for a wonderful home, which I am sure you will give him or her. Good luck!


See less See more
1 - 3 of 63 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.