Puppy Forum and Dog Forums banner

1 - 11 of 11 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
2 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
I impulsively bought a maltipoo yesterday for my 2 small daughters and it was all fun and games until the little guy (4 months) marked my in-laws' house twice and started whimpering and howling when I put him in the crate. I began feeling like I made a big mistake as I am not 100% ready to take on such a huge responsibilty. I realized that it's going to be tough on him since we work 8-9 hours/day. I entertained the thought of returning him but I felt immediate feelings of shame, guilt, and regret, so that is not going to be an option for me (although it'd probably be best for him...).

Sooooo... I'm here before you, dog lovers, HUMBLED... and asking for your advice. I have never owned a dog before and it's hitting me like a ton of bricks. Am I being a wuss and should just "man up" and take responsibility? I mean, he's a really great dog so far. I know the behaviors he's exhibiting are normal dog behaviors and that I'm the one with the problem - not 'Boy' (as my smallest insists on calling him). Will things get easier and dare I even say pleasant with time?

Please go easy on me... I recognize that I'm an impulsive, weak IDIOT and I'm hating myself for it. It's not who I thought I was...
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
12,761 Posts
It tends to get worse before it gets better...that is the nature of dogs. And, of course, how quickly it gets better is dependent on how much attention you can give to the dog. Leaving the dog for 8 hours during the day isn't best, but it can be done. Especially if you intend on taking the dog to puppy school, finding a schedule that works, and utilizing the time you do spend with the dog to lots of learning.

Re: the schedule, I'd really look into breaking up that 8 hour alone period. Either by utilizing the services of a dog walker, coming home during your lunch break, or by leaving the dog at a friend's or relatives house during the formative months. Otherwise, the house training could be a lengthy process.

Now enough of the self pity, and formulate a plan. Post it on the fridge for everyone to follow.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,248 Posts
I'm not going to rub it in too much, but if you got this puppy at a pet store, you most likely just supported a puppy mill. I would avoid that in the future and always search for reputable breeders or shelters/rescues. You don't want to line somebody's pocket's who doesn't have the dogs' best interest in mind.

A dog that young isn't marking, he just has to pee and doesn't know that it's not ok to do that inside. You need to teach him. When he goes inside ignore it and clean it up. When he goes outside give him treats and make a big deal about how good he is. This will encourage him to want to go outside. But a puppy this age can't hold it for more than a few hours, so he needs to be taken outside frequently so he doesn't have a chance to have many accidents. When you leave him during the day, expect accidents. Just clean it up and move on. I would keep him in a crate or xpen while you are gone to keep both him and your belongings safe. For more information on this you can search the forum. Doggy potty training is a really common question. :)

As for the crate, I would give him something to occupy him while he's in there (like a Kong toy stuffed with peanut butter) and ignore the crying if he continues. Only let him out of the crate once he is composed. This will teach him that calm behavior gets him what he wants, not whining and craziness. You can search the forum for crate training as well.

At this point, I wouldn't beat yourself up too much. Just look ahead and go all the research you can on teaching this dog how to behave in your home. It will take time before he is fully trained, but that's just how puppies are.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
673 Posts
Well, you made a pretty big blunder rushing into your first dog like that. Especially buying it for your kids. But, lots of people have done it before, and some of them manage to become great dog owners through it.

Marking at four months seems awful early. Are you sure he wasn't simply overexcited and had a full bladder? At that age they can still have trouble holding it for any significant amount of time.

Whimpering in the crate is pretty usual for a new dog. Has he had crate training prior to this? If not, or if you don't know, get him acclimated to it by feeding him and playing with him exclusively in the crate. Teach him it's an awesome place to be, and let him stay there for progressively longer periods. Don't let him out when he's whining- wait for him to settle first. And try not to leave him alone for 8-9 hours until he is older- could he stay with your inlaws during the day, or someone else? Later, 8 hours a day will most likely be ok, but for a puppy you're just asking for accidents in the house. If he really needs to be alone that long, give him something to occupy him like a Kong, and don't get angry when he makes a mess.

In the meantime, spend some time reading this forum, especially the stickies. There's a wealth of information here on pretty much every trouble a dog owner could have. If you cut it, great. If not, there's no shame in giving the pup the best life possible, even if it's somewhere else.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
13,074 Posts
Don't feel so all alone! I have had dogs for almost 50 years. I made a blunder and thought I would rescue a 4 week old puppy from being PTS or worse ( long story). I ended up looking like a piece of raw hamburger. He had not learned bite inhibition because of not having his Mom or litter mates( they died all but two) I kept him until he was 10 weeks old. My one sister who was in love with him from day one, adopted him from me. She also works and has three school age children. They are training and also using a crate while they are at work and at school. It just goes to show that it can be done. The pup is now 7 months old, crate trained, almost housebroken and doing well. It has taught me that no matter how many years I have had dogs or trained dogs or how sorry I feel for a puppy......I had better have my stuff together before going that route again! You can do it too if you really want to! :) Good luck! :)

EDIT- I mean to say "I will NEVER repeat that blunder again!"
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
871 Posts
just over a year ago, I took my kids school shopping at the mall and came home with a "papapoo" (papillon/poodle x). She was 12 weeks old, and the first dog I have ever owned as an adult. I had never trained a dog, or puppy, at all in my life. She was a good puppy, I just had no idea at all what I was doing. I screwed up royally with the housetraining and started with potty pads, and was told to do that from the pet store (which set us backs MONTHS in potty training success).
Leaving her in the first few days for several hours alone was unavoidable, and we crated her, and every time Id come home and find crap and pee all over in the crate. She screamed and whined a lot, and it felt a lot like it did when I brought home my first baby from the hospital.
It was hard. I went immediately to the library and checked out every single dog book they had (including ones written for young children). That helped a lot.

But, she was endearing, and once my kids went to school, I was home alone with her a lot, and we really bonded (even though I still insist that I dont really like dogs). She has been a great addition and really has helped my kids through a lot.

She was an "impulse buy", but I cant regret her, and I cant imagine having any other dog as our familys first dog.

Take a deep breath. You can do this. Lots of people work through the day and are able to have dogs. If you can help it, please dont take the dog back.
It will mean a LOT to your kids, and to the dog, and I suspect, to you as well, if you just wade through this hard time, it will get better.

Imagine if you returned your first kid bc she cried and peed on everything? lol (kidding:) Im sure she turned out to be worth the hard work.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
107 Posts
I adopted my two dogs when they were just 8 weeks old. There were quite a few nights of getting up every 3 hours to let the puppies go out and relieve themselves.
As for who you bought the dog for, that's irrelevant to the dog, he will soon realise who the leader of the pack is, it won't be who feeds him specifically but who shows the strongest leadership.
He's whimpering and howling when you put him in his crate because he's a pack animal and wants to be with the rest of his human pack. Once he's learned what he can and can't chew, and other basic rules, you can, as bad as it sounds, give him the run of the house (while maintaining your authority), and he will protect you and your's because you're all his.
As someone else mentioned above; reward his good deeds and ignore the minor misdeeds.

Naturally we all want to do the best for our puppies to ensure they're both happy and healthy. Every vet and breeder will (or should) tell you that the most obvious signs of a healthy dog are a shiny coat, pearly white teeth, light weight & not very smelly droppings, and the absence of "dog breath." On the right diet the dog's breath won't smell unless you just fed him fish and nor should his coat unless he's been rolling in something. People constantly argue against it but the best diet for a dog/wolf is it's natural diet, i.e. raw meat and bones, and plenty of fresh water.
At 4 months old the pup should be fully weaned already on an adult diet, however he may still be teething in which case lamb flap is great as it's got lots of soft cartilage which will pull out loose teeth (you're luck if you can save the milk teeth as they generally swallow them) chicken wings & drumsticks are a good staple diet for a young pup and when he gets a bit bigger he can eat chicken carcasses, the occasional fish, lamb necks, even whole rabbit - fur and all, only feed rabbit once a month though.
If money is a concern raw human grade meat and bone is actually quite cheap if you know where to get it, abattoirs and game hunters are generally the cheapest source. I'm not saying there's no risks involved but let's face it, a dog can choke on a bone just as easily as a rabbit can choke on a leaf. I've not heard of a single dog fed a purely raw meat and bone diet that hasn't lived to a ripe old age with less than a full set of pearly white teeth.

I wish you all the best with your new canine family member & feel free to PM if you want to know more about the diet my dogs are on and the benefits they're getting from it.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,277 Posts
You're not alone, trust me. The key is what you do now. If you keep the pup, I suggest you read the free textbook on this site about raising a puppy. Lots of good advice there.
http://www.dogstardaily.com/training/digital-dog-training-textbook

RE leaving the pup for 8 hours a day, it's not ideal, but it can be done. IMO, it makes housebreaking harder. If you can get someone to come at 4-5 hours, it would help. Puppies can only hold it about an hour for each month of life (e.g. 4 month old puppy can hold it about 4 hours).

A past member of the forum who knows a lot about dogs started a journal when she got her latest puppy. Read up on the puppy palace she set up - could work for you if you have to leave the pup alone that long every day: http://www.dogforums.com/general-dog-forum/81271-questas-puppy-journal.html
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
130 Posts
You are not alone! Just got LuLu 3 months ago. Though I think it's smarter to get a female cos they don't mark furniture:rockon: I also got her spayed so... errr.... less trouble?? LOL... BUT she was peeing and pooing anywhere she wanted PLUS chewing things she shouldn't be chewing and I was on the brink of going nuts and wondering if I had to quit my job to watch her all day.

For us it's a real slow and gradual improvement with consistent rewarding and (almost) 100% supervision whenever possible. It's tough but we can't give up cos if we do, the dog can't progress further. Even now she's still having potty mistakes here and there and she's still jumpy about children and sudden noises. Oh and we also leave her alone for 8hrs everyday and it makes training and socialising her much harder... especially hard to potty train but I believe with determination it can be done.

Just don't give up and hang around this forum and learn from posts by other people. You don't have to post to find your solution, someone else might have the same problems and there are many solutions suggested by the people here.

Most importantly remember to love and enjoy your dog :wink:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,350 Posts
I just have to say....your youngest insisting on calling the puppy "Boy" cracked my up!!!! LOL :)

You CAN get through this! Our first puppy wasn't completely impulsive, we had talked about getting a puppy, I had wanted a puppy, we had researched puppies! BUT, I wanted a Boston Terrier like my brother and sis in law had. My fiance didn't like that breed, but, he has friends that breed dachshunds, really lovely dachshunds, and had been excellent breeders for years. So, one day, he surprised me with one! I LOVED him, and was so excited to have a puppy!

I hear, from your post, that, having made this impulsive buy, you really want to make it right by raising the puppy right! That's such a great start! I tend to be long winded, so I'll try to keep this short!
- Be consistent! That is such a big thing!
- Read "The Bite Stops Here", which is a sticky at the top of one of the forum pages. It will help you teach your puppy bite inhibition. Puppies play by using their mouthes. It's completely natural. So, teaching them not to bite when they're playing can be challenging. It can also take awhile, because you're actually trying to teach him something, not just get him to stop biting.
- Puppies don't gain full physical control of their bladders til 6 months of age, give or take. They may know they have to pee but they can't always hold it. Imagine a toddler, mama and daddy ask if they have to go potty, and the toddler says no, but 20 seconds later, they've peed their pants.
- In the beginning, potty training is more about YOU than the PUPPY. You are in charge of getting the puppy out to potty when he needs to go. Puppies need to go after waking up (even from naps), after eating, drinking, playing, exercising, PLUS on a regular schedule, say every 2 hours (when you're home, of course).
- When you have the puppy out and about with the family, make sure you supervise! Puppies can sneak off to a corner to pee/poop so quickly! If you watch them super closely, you'll see the signs of him needing to go out.

Just know that when you are at work, you will probably come home to accidents. The puppy is just too young to hold it all day. It's not his fault. Clean it up, with an enzymatic cleaner (not just a regular household cleaner, even if it says it works on pet stains), don't scold, and move on. If you catch him in the act, make a noise to interrupt him, then rush him out to finish.

Give your puppy a walk every day! Walks are physically AND mentally stimulating! Do a bit of training each day with your puppy! Mental exercise tires them out, too!
Try to time your walks so that you give him exercise before he needs to go into his crate.
Give your puppy a frozen, stuffed kong so he has something to do when you're gone.

Watch your puppy's body language! You can learn a lot, like when he's getting just a bit too excited, or when he needs to pee/poop, or when he's tired. I know, you have kids, so learning the body language a puppy shows when he's getting just a bit too hyper can really help, so that your puppy never gets too rough with your children. You can interrupt the play, and get your puppy to do something else instead.

Good luck with your "Boy"!
 
1 - 11 of 11 Posts
Top