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Discussion Starter #1
I have adopted a 3 year old American Bulldog/Boxer mix. He was found as a strey and fostered. Well there are some issues I have been having with his foster mom.

When we picked him up I was a lil disappointed. Come to find out she was only feeding him once a day and he was skinny. You could see his backbone sticking up and his ribs. She was a very high anxiety person and it was making him very anxious. Once we got him in our home with us he calmed right down and was so very hungry. We have been having a bit of a problem that when she came to visit and see how he was doing he got very high anxiety and it took aobut an hour for him to chill out after she left. I don't want to limit her visiting but it seems that it stresses him out. She will come in the hosue squealing very high pitched and jumping up and down around him. I'm not menaing to complain I lvoe her for everything she has done for him and us but there is a point where it upsets him. Now that he has gained some weight and looks better she has told me that he needs to be on a diet and that he is fat.

I don't want to be rude but I think we need a bit you know. Let me know what you think and how the best way to tell her to back off and not to squeal like that at him. I know that it's hard being a foster mom and to watch that dog get adopted.
 

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So is he officially yours? Did you finish the adoption process?
 

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This is the main reason I'm shying away from any rescue that says they want to do follow-up visits after the adoption. Is the foster parent in charge of the rescue organization or is she just one of many foster parents within a larger organization. If I were you, I may talk to the rescue organization about the under-feeding if you feel she could be a risk to other fosters. I would tell her that according to the vet. he was severely underweight when you got him and he is just right now or something like that. How often does she want to visit and did you agree to a certian number of visits when you adopted?
 

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Discussion Starter #4 (Edited)
So is he officially yours? Did you finish the adoption process?
Yes he is officially mine.

This is the main reason I'm shying away from any rescue that says they want to do follow-up visits after the adoption. Is the foster parent in charge of the rescue organization or is she just one of many foster parents within a larger organization. If I were you, I may talk to the rescue organization about the under-feeding if you feel she could be a risk to other fosters. I would tell her that according to the vet. he was severely underweight when you got him and he is just right now or something like that. How often does she want to visit and did you agree to a certian number of visits when you adopted?
The rescue that put his picture up would not take him in cause he was not a full boxer. They will not take mixes. She is just the person that found him and held onto him till the new owners came along to adopt. When I talked to the rescue I told them aobut him and what was happeneing and becuase she was not one of their "regular" fosters that she prolly will not have any though them.

I had tole her that she could call or email and maybe once in a while have a play date. There was no certian ammount of visits set up. She accually popped by the house without calling or letting me know today and that upset me a bit.
 

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If I were you, I would tell her nicely that she needs to call or email you to set up a time that would work for you if she wants to pay a visit. I would also tell her nicely that she can not stop by unannounced. Explain to her what you have observed and what the vet has said about him. Also explain to her that you 2 are bonding and that you think it may be in his(your dog) best interest if visits were kept to a minimum. That is what I would do :)

I'm not sure what I would do if she was unreceptive about everything, considering she does know where you live. Hopefully someone else here will have some advice.
 

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Discussion Starter #6
If I were you, I would tell her nicely that she needs to call or email you to set up a time that would work for you if she wants to pay a visit. I would also tell her nicely that she can not stop by unannounced. Explain to her what you have observed and what the vet has said about him. Also explain to her that you 2 are bonding and that you think it may be in his(your dog) best interest if visits were kept to a minimum. That is what I would do :)

I'm not sure what I would do if she was unreceptive about everything, considering she does know where you live. Hopefully someone else here will have some advice.
Thank you so much. I will send her an email and point that out very nicely to her like you ahve suggested. Like I said I feel bad cause she did help the dog but she did also do some damage. Basically I didn't want to hurt anyone but it's hurting me and him in the long run to do things her way. Thanks again
Tiff
 

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Discussion Starter #8
Hope it goes well. I agree that it's not cool for her to come over without prior notice/invitation.

Thanks for rescuing!

Thank you!! I think I just needed some back up from you guys it helped a lot. I couldnt imagine being without him he's settled in so well with us. I work from home and he's my buddy for sure
 

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I help with a rescue that breaks all contacts with previous owners (except for unusual circumstances). It is very difficult on the dog and they get very confused.

I don't think it is wrong to tell her that she is crossing the lines. I would just remind her that every dog is different and needs a different situation to work for them. It is a difficult situation for sure.

Our rescue does call or visit after adopting out but it is never the foster mom who had the dog. It is always a different volunteer.
 

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Discussion Starter #10 (Edited)
I help with a rescue that breaks all contacts with previous owners (except for unusual circumstances). It is very difficult on the dog and they get very confused.

I don't think it is wrong to tell her that she is crossing the lines. I would just remind her that every dog is different and needs a different situation to work for them. It is a difficult situation for sure.

Our rescue does call or visit after adopting out but it is never the foster mom who had the dog. It is always a different volunteer.
I totally agree. Thank you

I had tried to talk to the foster mom very nicely about the situation. She said I can't keep her dog from her and that she had him for 2 years so he's more her dog than mine. That upset me so I finally said please do not come over without emailing and ASKING first and please do not email or call several times a day. I do have my own business and I am the only person that woorks and runs it. My hubby does help but he has a full time job. I have been so busy with work. Then she told me she will come get him back cause I don't have the time for him. That's not the case at all!!! I didn't want to be mean but I think I had to get mean to get the point across. I haven't had a call or an email since.

Thank you all for your thoughts and support.
Tiff and Bishop

 

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She said I can't keep her dog from her and that she had him for 2 years so he's more her dog than mine.
Good grief. Does she not understand what it means to foster a dog? I'm glad you were clear with her. I hope you have no more problems.

ETA: I love the picture. He's a beautiful boy!
 

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Discussion Starter #12
Good grief. Does she not understand what it means to foster a dog? I'm glad you were clear with her. I hope you have no more problems.

ETA: I love the picture. He's a beautiful boy!
Thanks so much! He's finally gaining the weight he needs. It's so funny cause his ears always sit like that. The one is folded in the back. I don't think I will have anymore problems I think that I made her mad enough lol. I didn't mean to but I was just fed up.

Have a good one, it's cold here hope you are warm!
Tiff and Bishop
 

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Honestly, I would tell her that she is not welcome.

He's your dog now. He's seen your vet. She has absolutely no right to see him.

It was a very nice thing for you to be gracious and let her visit, but she has taken it too far.

And don't let Bishop in your yard or anywhere unattended -- the wackadoodle may think she can take him back!

He's super adorable, by the way!! Sounds like a lucky guy!! :)
 

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... She said I can't keep her dog from her and that she had him for 2 years so he's more her dog than mine...
Wow, a bit scary. I hope the situation has improved. If not I'ld think about a restraining order. That lady doesn't sound too stable. When she handed Bishop over to you for adoption she forfeited ALL rights to him. Bishop is 100%yours now and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Please update us!

Jihad
and the pound puppy crew.
 

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Discussion Starter #16 (Edited)
Honestly, I would tell her that she is not welcome.

He's your dog now. He's seen your vet. She has absolutely no right to see him.

It was a very nice thing for you to be gracious and let her visit, but she has taken it too far.

And don't let Bishop in your yard or anywhere unattended -- the wackadoodle may think she can take him back!

He's super adorable, by the way!! Sounds like a lucky guy!! :)
Thank you so much!! Yes he is very closely watched outside for sure. You never know what people are going to do these days. We love this guy so so so much!! He is the typical emotional bulldog and the hubby gets all worried if Bishop is being emotional. That usually happens when he is not given people food lol. We are trying to break him of that habbit. :)
Thanks so much

Wow, a bit scary. I hope the situation has improved. If not I'ld think about a restraining order. That lady doesn't sound too stable. When she handed Bishop over to you for adoption she forfeited ALL rights to him. Bishop is 100%yours now and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Please update us!

Jihad
and the pound puppy crew.
Things have gotten a bit better. Thank you for your advice. if she has any more issues I should send her the link to what everyone has said lol.
 

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hi
i had gooten a sheltie from a vet the owners didnt want anymore i let them do a house check i have to ay she was upset that the dog jumped on the couch so i said this is going to be his new home and we are fine with it then she said we would like to visit from time to time and i said for now i would rather you didnt the dog would be confused
so she called and buged me for 4 days and then i findley said he is ours now and i perfur you not to contact me anymore she was made but got over it
so continue your good work and keep us posted
jamie
 

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Discussion Starter #18
hi
i had gooten a sheltie from a vet the owners didnt want anymore i let them do a house check i have to ay she was upset that the dog jumped on the couch so i said this is going to be his new home and we are fine with it then she said we would like to visit from time to time and i said for now i would rather you didnt the dog would be confused
so she called and buged me for 4 days and then i findley said he is ours now and i perfur you not to contact me anymore she was made but got over it
so continue your good work and keep us posted
jamie

Wow might be the same person lol. Glad you were able to nip that. I think mine finally is.

We have started training classes with him. We are going to a retired police dog trainer. We have some issues with him trying to attack people that are high. A neighbor that does not have the best past time habbits was high (I didn't know) and Bishop lunged at him. They have knew eachother since I got him and have been playtime buds. The guy is great with dogs and never had a problem. I asked him the other day what happened and he thought he somehow hurt Bishop and he felt bad. he said thats the fisrt time that he was high around him.

So to say the least he is keeping his distance when he is high thank goodness cuase I don;t wanna be around him either.
 

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so did the weird lady say all the stuff in email? or was it person to person or phone?

hopefully you can get it in email form, just in case the lunatic actually gets your dog. you'll have recourse to get him back.

gj though :)

btw, the link in your sig doesn't go to blogspot :p
 

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Discussion Starter #20
so did the weird lady say all the stuff in email? or was it person to person or phone?

hopefully you can get it in email form, just in case the lunatic actually gets your dog. you'll have recourse to get him back.

gj though :)

btw, the link in your sig doesn't go to blogspot :p
Nope it was all in person or on the phone. I am not too worried about her trying to get him cuase I run my business from home and am always with him. He is microchipped in my name and everything else. I don;t think she has have balls to take him from me or steal him. I have a 250 pound hawiian hubby lol :)

Humm I will have to fix that link somehow
 
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