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8 Posts
Hey everyone,
My wife and I have a 6 month old Jack Russell-Chihuahua mix. We both love the dog immensely and seem to spoil her daily —*whether it's through attention or treats, we just cannot get enough of this dog. We adopted her so I would have more of a friend around the house while I was busy working (I'm working from home at least once a week, job permitting). Initially she would display favoritism towards me, come near me and lay down on my lap, or chest, leave my wife's side if I sat on the couch, etc. She felt very comfortable with me.
It's become a complete reversal in behavior. My wife walks her in the morning and puts in a brief play period before she leaves for work. I wake up and let her out for a couple minutes before I start getting ready; but I usually come home for lunch to let her out again. We left for a weekend trip and upon coming back she spent all of 10 seconds with me, then showered my wife with affection. I'm usually working in my office at night, or relaxing by the computer - my wife on the other hand is always on the couch, and the dog cannot be by herself, she requires human contact constantly. So they're cuddling all evening long.
It's become a rather anxious and depressive situation for me. When she leaves for bed, the dog has begun to whine by the door. I'm truthfully happy for their relationship but it's an involuntary feeling of rejection that overwhelms my senses always being placed in these positions. I play with her daily, or try to. We rough-house, and I chase her around the house (which she loves, her tongue nearly hitting the floor). She's very excited whenever I come home, especially when she's already out of her crate. During the cold winter months it's been hard to walk her —*she's tiny and those little pads cannot handle the freezing ground.
Ironically, she never listens to my wife. I say an order and she follows, submissively. I'm more stern. I was raised with several german shepherds and have subconsciously adopted my father's personality when it comes to training animals. I was a tad rough with her at first when she misbehaved; having your own dog vs. your parents definitely changes your perceptions, and the inexperience might have led to poor choices in discipline, nothing extreme, just the quick yank on the fur. I stopped doing it the moment I read it disrupts bonding. My wife can yell and scream while the dog will just bark back. I say a word and she comes closer to me and lays down, her ears low and tail wagging. I try to balance my fun personality with that of an owner.
What can I do? Does she seem completely bonded to my wife? What actions can I take to not only improve my relationship but to become a better person around her? Can I change her perceptions of me? The last thing I want is for her to be afraid of me. I'll mention too, I can yell, not at anyone in particular, but if there's a game on, or I'm playing something - I can get heated, but it's all smoke with zero substance, but my wife has commented that the puppy feels afraid.
The last thing I'll mention; I have plans to take her to more formal training when she's fully vaccinated.
Thanks for reading!
My wife and I have a 6 month old Jack Russell-Chihuahua mix. We both love the dog immensely and seem to spoil her daily —*whether it's through attention or treats, we just cannot get enough of this dog. We adopted her so I would have more of a friend around the house while I was busy working (I'm working from home at least once a week, job permitting). Initially she would display favoritism towards me, come near me and lay down on my lap, or chest, leave my wife's side if I sat on the couch, etc. She felt very comfortable with me.
It's become a complete reversal in behavior. My wife walks her in the morning and puts in a brief play period before she leaves for work. I wake up and let her out for a couple minutes before I start getting ready; but I usually come home for lunch to let her out again. We left for a weekend trip and upon coming back she spent all of 10 seconds with me, then showered my wife with affection. I'm usually working in my office at night, or relaxing by the computer - my wife on the other hand is always on the couch, and the dog cannot be by herself, she requires human contact constantly. So they're cuddling all evening long.
It's become a rather anxious and depressive situation for me. When she leaves for bed, the dog has begun to whine by the door. I'm truthfully happy for their relationship but it's an involuntary feeling of rejection that overwhelms my senses always being placed in these positions. I play with her daily, or try to. We rough-house, and I chase her around the house (which she loves, her tongue nearly hitting the floor). She's very excited whenever I come home, especially when she's already out of her crate. During the cold winter months it's been hard to walk her —*she's tiny and those little pads cannot handle the freezing ground.
Ironically, she never listens to my wife. I say an order and she follows, submissively. I'm more stern. I was raised with several german shepherds and have subconsciously adopted my father's personality when it comes to training animals. I was a tad rough with her at first when she misbehaved; having your own dog vs. your parents definitely changes your perceptions, and the inexperience might have led to poor choices in discipline, nothing extreme, just the quick yank on the fur. I stopped doing it the moment I read it disrupts bonding. My wife can yell and scream while the dog will just bark back. I say a word and she comes closer to me and lays down, her ears low and tail wagging. I try to balance my fun personality with that of an owner.
What can I do? Does she seem completely bonded to my wife? What actions can I take to not only improve my relationship but to become a better person around her? Can I change her perceptions of me? The last thing I want is for her to be afraid of me. I'll mention too, I can yell, not at anyone in particular, but if there's a game on, or I'm playing something - I can get heated, but it's all smoke with zero substance, but my wife has commented that the puppy feels afraid.
The last thing I'll mention; I have plans to take her to more formal training when she's fully vaccinated.
Thanks for reading!