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Sorry that you had to make this decision, but it sounds like it will be best for everyone involved.

Post plenty of pics when you get the new pup! I would love to see it!

As for the girls/boys debate...well, I have had 2 girls and one boy. There isn't a whole lot of difference--all were fixed...my male doesn't mark much, even outside.
 

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Hello, I just joined the forum and saw your post but it was from 2010. Everything was so familiar as we got a Bichon from a PA breeder with almost same issues at the begining. My question to you is are you able to resolve the difficulties over time and was he able to adjust eventually?

Hello all;

We recently (almost three weeks now) got a purebred male Bichon Frise from a breeder. He is 10 months old. The breeder told us that she had initially intended to keep him as a show dog but she decided to let him go because she felt he is not "aggressive" enough! Our initial reaction to that was "perfect" for us!!!

Let me start with a preface - we choose a Bichon Frise because we have three kids, 11, 8 and 3 Yr. old (boy, girl, girl) and after doing some research we believed Bichons are very playful, very "family" oriented and that they love kids!

Now back to our Bichon - he is not aggressive at all! He almost NEVER barks - to the point that my wife an I at first thought he was mute!!! :confused: But he proved us wrong after the second time that we crated him for the night! :p

I think it is first important for me to lay out what his relationship is with our family: I am his favorite, my wife is second ,my son, with some cation, is the third, and as for my two girls, he is fearful of them, YES, that is right, FEARFUL!!.

Clearly we are having several issues:

First, and I would say this is our MAJOR concern right now, is that he is VERY shy and constantly in state of alertness and caution. His initial reaction is to back off and run away. He does not bark at strangers and runs away all the time. Worst of all he is VERY, VERY afraid of my 8 and 3 year old daughters. My 8 Year old is the gentlest soul on earth and yet he runs as if she is about to behead him. If I attempt to hold him to let my daughter to pet him he will fight his way out my arms with all his mighty. If she does in fact get close to him, he will not take any treats from her whatsoever. We have also had an occasion where my wife held him for my daughter to pet him and he has pissed on my wife, our assumption, from fear!!! This is impacting my daughters, specially the 8 year old, as they are feeling rejected!!!

Second, he is NOT playful at all! We have yet to find a toy that he likes! He has not, to date, played with any of his toys! As I mentioned, he is so concerned and in a constant state of being worried of his surroundings that he does not play with anyone or anything. The only time I have gotten him to do some fetching is when I am all alone with him and he is sure that no one else is around!

Third, housebreaking attempts have also proven to be fatal thus far. In majority of times, almost 90%, when we take him for a walk he does nothing but almost immediately after we bring him back home he goes!!!:eek: We can't understand that! He does love the idea of getting out o fthe house for his walk but lately, after I take him for his walk, as soon as we get close to the house he refuses to walk toward the house. In fact for the past couple of days I have had to pick him up and take him inside!! :(

Fourth, we have gotten him a few beds and have placed them in several location of the house but he refuses to lay on them. He will sniff it, walk on it but then you will find him sitting next to it as opose to sitting on top of it!! :confused:

So we desperatly need some help and insight here as to what may be going on and what it is we need to do to take care of these issues, particulairly the first issue, before our view for him turns from the joy to one of sorrow and grief!:(

Thank you in advance!
 

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Hello, I just joined the forum and saw your post but it was from 2010. Everything was so familiar as we got a Bichon from a PA breeder with almost same issues at the begining. My question to you is are you able to resolve the difficulties over time and was he able to adjust eventually?
We'll never know. The OP hasn't been here for about ten years. I would recommend you start a new thread.
 
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