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First off, I will ask you what are your ultimate goals for Chloe & agility? Do you have your sights set on actually competing? or is this really just for a fun activity for you to do together?

If competing is in your future, then I would think that you should have started off with a 'foundations' class where (it's my understanding, I've never actually taken one) there is little to no actual equipment introduced, but you learn lots of handling techniques that you will need. I would also be more likely (if competing is the goal) to follow the strict guidelines of the instructor.

If you're just in it for the fun? Nah! She should make it an enjoyable experience for the two of you. Especially since it's private lessons, what's the point of being so inflexible? I took my Beckett through an agility class (semi private, 2 of us participating) and while the instructor helped us work through things, if we wanted to do our 'own thing' or change things up a bit - her opinion was "Hey! This is YOUR class."

Again, this is coming from the perspective of someone who has absolutely NO desire to compete in the sport. We were just trying to have fun.
 

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No interest in competing. She is a very bright dog, and I just thought she would find it interesting. Sadly, she found it horribly boring.
In that case, I'd have an honest talk with your instructor. If she's not willing to bend a bit to make your experience a good one (and I mean for both you & Chloe) then I'd be looking for another agility trainer. As long as you're not doing anything actually dangerous, then I wouldn't be all that worried about what's "proper" to do in an agility class.
My Beckett is 11 years old, and horribly dog reactive, so he doesn't get to go many places. This was just something for him to do one on one with me. We both had a great time. If you find a trainer with the right sort of attitude, I'm sure you & Chloe would have a fun time with it as well. Keep looking!
 

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Actually just the opposite. She sent me letter telling me that I couldn't continue unless I was willing to do precisely what she wanted. Chloe peed once and she warned me there would be fines if it happened again. I don't know how well she can run in diapers.

I have built a lot of apparatus and will continue at home. I am also looking into sheep herding. Apparently Tollers are good at it.
Well, that's just absurd! I'd call a parting of the ways 'good riddance', honestly. I'm so sorry you two had such a bad experience! I hope you're able to find some sort of fun class that will challenge & enrich you both.
 
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