Response from foster mom of our new dog

Dieselsmama · 09-03-2007, 07:52 AM

So yep, we adopted a new dog. Charlie is a beautiful yellow lab, about 2 yrs. old. I was emailing back and forth with his previous foster mom, and happened to mention he'd lifted his leg on the food bin. I let him know I wasn't impressed and really believe he'll not continue this behaviour and that it's totally stress related. He's really wound up right now but I think he'll settle in given some time. He's been through a long journey and had to go through heartworm treatment prior to being released for adoption. So I just got her email response and was really shocked by her response. He's such a good boy and doesn't deserve this kind of response or treatment.

"I hate hearing that. He knows better and I think he is a little stressed from
his journey and new surroundings. You do need to get on him if he does it
again. He knows better. Take the paper to your hand, rub his nose in it, and
put him outside. That really hurts his feelings and you don't even have to
touch him.

Charlie is a bit high strung but I promise he will settle down.

After talking with you and exchanging emails, he is the most lucky pup in the
world to have you and I thank you for loving him as much as I do!!!!!!!"

I can't even formulate a good response right now...What does the "and you don't even have to touch him part mean?? Did she think I'd beat him?? Gosh I thought she'd be more educated on proper training methods.

briteday · 09-03-2007, 01:11 PM

I hate to think that a rescue organization is using this person for fostering. However, I foster for a local humane society and we get no training, so I guess everyonw is just doing what they do best.

I never rub a dog's nose in its mess. That is so humiliating. Howabout we rub her nose in her mess!

And knowing how stressed dogs get in a foster home, one should be able to understand that it will take a while for the dog to settle into your home. Jeesh!

opokki · 09-03-2007, 01:27 PM

It is unfortunate that some still think this way. I am just relieved that you know better.

digits mama · 09-03-2007, 01:31 PM

Some people dont have brains..But the one thing is that poor Charlie wont have that happen again

Congrats on your Charlie...Tommorrow me and my step mom is going to pick up her rescue Yorkie. I cant wait to meet my new sister

If I had to respond to that I would tell her that You have a way better technique to training bad behavior. Maybe educate her on your humane training secrets. Its sad because she will probably get another foster. But like Briteday says, She probably just doesnt have the know how and needs to be clued in so you can feel better knowing she fosters and is out there continuing to help animals.

Renoman · 09-03-2007, 01:46 PM

As for the former foster mom, well, some people just don't have any idea and you just can't change their way of thinking. All I can add is that thank goodness Charlie found his way to you.

I think you're right. He's hyper because of his new environment. He's been moved around alot probably. He needs time to adjust. Buck was like that when he came to me. Hyper wasn't the word. .....

It took him a good 3 - 4 weeks to settle in. Once he got in sync with the routine that helped immensely. He got a little freaky when I first took him in the car with me, I think he was afraid of being taken to yet another place. He's been with me about 1 1/2 years now and it's like he's been here forever.

Good luck with Charlie. He sounds like he'll be a great dog and a great addition to your family.

Dieselsmama · 09-04-2007, 08:34 PM

Thanks everyone, Charlie is slowly settling in, I expect it will take some time yet before the panting and constant pacing stop. At least he will lie down for a moment or two now. He sure does like to swim!! He's a labradiver LOL. Ella is trying to play with him, but he won't let her get near the toys he hoards in his mouth and if she's got a toy she happily gives it to him but doesn't get why he doesn't want to share with her

She learned the hard way not to try to play tug with him, he snapped at her (didn't really hurt her, just shocked her) and she ran squeaking to hide under me. Anyway, they are both adjusting, Charlie to everything new here and Ella to Charlie. I can't seem to wear him out, Ella is sure wiped out trying to keep up tho...

Inga · 09-04-2007, 08:58 PM

sounds like you will have your hands full for some time. Best of Luck with everything. I am glad Charlie made it to your home. Sounds like a positive change. I know of far too many people that believe wiping a dogs nose in it's mess somehow potty trains the dog. You could simply tell her how successful your training method worked for Charlie and hope she will learn something from it. You can't blame someone for not knowing better if they never had opportunity to learn. Hopefully she will be receptive. Most people are if it is approached gently. Good Luck!

Alpha · 09-05-2007, 01:07 AM

I think everyone's heard the old, "Rub his nose in it" thing before...

It's just as common as, "Feeding your dogs red meat will make them crazy.."

There are a tonne of old ways of doing things out there that are still thought to be the "right" way.

An e-mail back to her, something along the lines of:

"Thank you very much for your reply, but I prefer to use more positive methods with my dogs as I tend to see a more positive response. I'm quite sure I wouldn't appreciate getting my nosed rubbed in my waste if I accidentally went in the "for show" bathroom!

..."

Perhaps something light hearted, but at the same time informative.

I agree with others though, it's sad that someone involved with a rescue organization is using these methods, but at the same time, she has to get some credit for fostering animals without a home. While she may not be doing it the best way, I thinks he deserves some credit for doing at all.