[jmdjb@live.com]

Tuesday i put my 18 year old boy Bandit to sleep. He was my best friend and my handsome boy...i know he had a long life, definetly a happy and loving home. He was simply spoiled rotten..but i cannot stop crying..

I know its only been 2 days but the mornings..and the night time are terrible.
Ive been taking anti anxiety medication for a few days as per my dr. because i just felt awful..I am trying so hard to remember the happiness he brought to my life which there was sooooo much of but right now all i can feel is that i miss him and i want to hold him. And i cant. I got bandit when i was 22 and am now 40. I almost feel like ive lost a child.. Am i taking this too hard??

[RedyreRottweilers]

I am so sorry for your loss. Some of them cut so deeply.

[FilleBelle]

There is no such thing as "taking it too hard" when it comes to grief. You feel the way you feel and that way is acceptable. If you find yourself unable to function, it's also acceptable to speak to a counselor or a doctor, as you have done.

The hurt will heal. I know this.

[LadyD]

jmd, I so sorry for your loss. I know exactly how you feel. We had to have our 19 year old Boston Terrier put down 2 years ago. It hurt so much but it had to be done, he had a stroke and couldn't even stand up anymore. Time helps heal the pain but you never forget them.

[RIPCapone]

I put my girl to sleep about 2 1/2 hours after you wrote your post. I am also on medication, but mine is permanent. I sometimes just zone out in sadness and disbelief when I think of her, so I don't think you are overreacting at all. I find it comforting that I'm not the only one who loved their pet so fiercely. I hope you and myself become at peace with this quickly.

[jmdjb@live.com]

Its been a month now since our lovey's have left our side , i just wanted you to know, my medication is permanent too. Ive been on antidepressants since i was 24. But the loss of my bandit put me into such anxiety and sadness that the dr put me on an additional med called lyrica. It has helped some but i still miss my dog soo so much. Its so strange , i think about him every night before bed and havent had a dream about him yet. Do you believe in heaven? Do you believe we will be with them again someday? Ive been asking for some kind of sign that he is ok. I did hear a bark just like his, hoarse and very distinctive about 3am the other night. It was only twice and then it stopped. I want to believe in things like that but its hard to. How are you dealing with your loss? Let me know how you are and thanks for writing to me.

michelle

[ladyshadowhollyjc]

Originally Posted by jmdjb@live.com

Its been a month now since our lovey's have left our side , i just wanted you to know, my medication is permanent too. Ive been on antidepressants since i was 24. But the loss of my bandit put me into such anxiety and sadness that the dr put me on an additional med called lyrica. It has helped some but i still miss my dog soo so much. Its so strange , i think about him every night before bed and havent had a dream about him yet. Do you believe in heaven? Do you believe we will be with them again someday? Ive been asking for some kind of sign that he is ok. I did hear a bark just like his, hoarse and very distinctive about 3am the other night. It was only twice and then it stopped. I want to believe in things like that but its hard to. How are you dealing with your loss? Let me know how you are and thanks for writing to me.

michelle

Yesterday was my first birthday since I was 4 year old that I spent without my firs dog Lady. After having her for 16 years, it was a lot to deal with for me. They say when animals die they cross the Rainbow Bridge. There's a poem about it.

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

Yesterday I was quite sad even though I lost my girl back in December. It was a tough day, and every now and then I feel sad at night before I go to bed. The night before my birthday I was just wondering to myself if she was okay and if dogs really do cross the Rainbow Bridge. And then yesterday evening my father came home and told us all to come outside. Over top of our house was a double rainbow. Most people wouldn't see special out of that, but I did. I felt like it was my girl showing me the Rainbow Bridge.

I know that may seem crazy or stupid to some people, but it was really what I needed.

[Inga]

You are most definitely NOT taking it too hard. You loved your baby. I know exactly how you feel. I wish I had some wise words to help ease your pain but there are none. They say that time heals all wounds. The truth is, time helps to ease the pain but your memories will always be there and their will be a spot in your heart waiting for a reunion with your much loved pup.

Ladyshadow, That was lovely.

[jmdjb@live.com]

Originally Posted by RIPCapone

I put my girl to sleep about 2 1/2 hours after you wrote your post. I am also on medication, but mine is permanent. I sometimes just zone out in sadness and disbelief when I think of her, so I don't think you are overreacting at all. I find it comforting that I'm not the only one who loved their pet so fiercely. I hope you and myself become at peace with this quickly.

Its been a month now since our lovey's have left our side , i just wanted you to know, my medication is permanent too. Ive been on antidepressants since i was 24. But the loss of my bandit put me into such anxiety and sadness that the dr put me on an additional med called lyrica. It has helped some but i still miss my dog soo so much. Its so strange , i think about him every night before bed and havent had a dream about him yet. Do you believe in heaven? Do you believe we will be with them again someday? Ive been asking for some kind of sign that he is ok. I did hear a bark just like his, hoarse and very distinctive about 3am the other night. It was only twice and then it stopped. I want to believe in things like that but its hard to. How are you dealing with your loss? Let me know how you are and thanks for writing to me.

[bnwalker2]

I'm so very sorry for your loss

[DJsMom]

I'm very sorry for your loss & your heart ache

[RIPCapone]

Originally Posted by jmdjb@live.com

Its been a month now since our lovey's have left our side , i just wanted you to know, my medication is permanent too. Ive been on antidepressants since i was 24. But the loss of my bandit put me into such anxiety and sadness that the dr put me on an additional med called lyrica. It has helped some but i still miss my dog soo so much. Its so strange , i think about him every night before bed and havent had a dream about him yet. Do you believe in heaven? Do you believe we will be with them again someday? Ive been asking for some kind of sign that he is ok. I did hear a bark just like his, hoarse and very distinctive about 3am the other night. It was only twice and then it stopped. I want to believe in things like that but its hard to. How are you dealing with your loss? Let me know how you are and thanks for writing to me.

Hey jmdjb,

Do not feel anxious about the feelings you are going through. I'm starting to feel better, but the weight of sadness still sits on my chest. I know what you are feeling. I've had some pretty bad anxiety also, and I was kind of neurotic. Medication adjustments are almost futile at this point in your life. You will not be able to shake the sadness, nor should you try. It will transform itself from sadness to fond memories in time. Only time will heal your heart, try to remember that. Just stay strong. Find solace in the fact that you gave your boy a life that so many unfortunate dogs could only dream about. You were destined to be Bandit's owner. He was destined to be yours. And he will ALWAYS be yours.

I believe in heaven (I also believe that everyone is free to believe what they want, and no one should be judged by their religion and denomination). But me, I believe in heaven. I believe we will be reunited with the ones that we loved. I cannot fathom an existence that has no afterlife. The thought that we will never see our loved again is extremely depressing. I don't think that life is that empty. Just like I know when I love someone, I know there is a heaven... it's one of those things that you don't have to see to know. And I know I will see Capone again. She'll probably be the first one that welcomes me.

I buried my her in my back yard and built a gravesite with flowers. I used to go back there when I would have a cigarette. I'd go out into the yard, and stand in front of the grave. Now when I go outside it is just to visit her. I've since quit smoking. I've had deaths on both sides of the family due to cancer. Even Capone died of cancer. I would be a real ass if I kept on smoking after seeing all the suffering. I'm glad I wisened up.

My suggestion would be (if you haven't done so already), do something special to honor your loved and lost. Nothing that will overly sadden you, but something uniquely dedicatory to Bandit. It may help you to remember him in a comforting way. I myself made a photomontage of Capone. I posted it on this forum when she died. If you want to see it, here's a quick link: http://home.comcast.net/~glass_aa/capsmall.jpg

I printed and framed it, and it's up on the wall right above the computer monitor I'm looking at now. I get to see her every day. It will always keep her fresh in my mind and heart. It still makes me sad, but it comforts me more. It reminds me that although I will not see her for a long time, she does still exist. And so does Bandit. Just imagine when you are reunited and he comes running as fast as he can, and tackles you with licks and kisses.

Sorry for writing a novel

[heiress]

I also felt sad for the loss of our little puppy Nikki. She's the little member of our family and in fact the first dog to touch my heart. I don't know, but I just felt soooo sad. I've cried. And even cried as I went to the vet. I don't know how to cope up with this sadness. I don't feel like getting another dog anymore because I don't want to get hurt again. And I don't want someone else to replace our Nikki.

[Ty_Tyler]

Originally Posted by ladyshadowhollyjc

The night before my birthday I was just wondering to myself if she was okay and if dogs really do cross the Rainbow Bridge. And then yesterday evening my father came home and told us all to come outside. Over top of our house was a double rainbow. Most people wouldn't see special out of that, but I did. I felt like it was my girl showing me the Rainbow Bridge.

I know that may seem crazy or stupid to some people, but it was really what I needed.

Wow. That is amazing.