Put my dog to sleep today - heartbroken

hey jude · 01-04-2008, 06:30 PM

Today is a day I always dreaded. I put my 17 year old poodle to sleep today at 1 p.m.. I am heartbroken and just took down 2 'baby' gates that I had in the kitchen for years. I know time 'heals all' but I am alone - kids are grown. I can't stop crying. El Capitan (Cappy) was a small mini poodle under 10 lbs. I came home from work EVERY day at noon to take him out. He was the sweetest little guy in the world. My eyes are swollen and I'm not answering the phone which is ringing non stop.

I'll never forget him. Thanks for reading my post...

southerncomfortbloodhound · 01-04-2008, 06:50 PM

I am soooo sorry for your lost. I have never had to put one down but I have had a few pass on due to old age. I have one getting close and I have nightmares of him leaving without me getting to say goodbye. He has been my friend sence I was 8 yrs old and now at 21, I am parranoid and can only say I feel your pains in fear of feeling your pain again. Cappy would want you to be happy though, and do it in memory of him.

Please read this poem, it was sent to me last year when one of my beloved friends passed on, and it brought a warmth to my heart.

A LOAN FROM GOD

God promised at the birth of time, a special friend to give,
his time on earth is short, he said, so love him while he
lives. It may be six or seven years, or twelve or then
sixteen, but will you, till I call him back, take care of him for
me? A wagging tail and cold wet nose, and silken velvet
ears, a heart as big as all outdoors, to love you through the
years. His puppy ways will gladden you, and antics bring a
smile, as guardian or friend he will, be loyal all the while.
He'll bring his charms to grace your life, and though his stay
be brief, when he's gone the memories, are solace for your
grief. I cannot promise he will stay, since all from earth
return, but lessons only a dog can teach, I want you each
to learn. Whatever love you give to him, returns in triple
measure, follow his lead and gain a life, brim full of simple
pleasure. Enjoy each day as it comes, allow your heart to
guide, be loyal and steadfast in love, as the dog there by
your side. Now will you give him all your love, nor think the
labor vain, nor hate me when I come to call, to take him
back again? I fancy each of us would say, "Dear Lord, thy
will be done, for all the joy this day shall bring, the risk of
grief we'll run." "We'll shelter him with tenderness, we'll love
him while we may, and for the happiness we've known,
forever grateful stay." "But shall the angels call for him,
much sooner than we've planned, we'll brave the bitter grief
that comes, and try to understand."

ChrissyBz · 01-04-2008, 08:18 PM

I'm so sorry for your loss. I completely understand what you're going though. There are no words to express the pain you feel, I know. Many people here feel your pain with you.

Know that you are not alone.

hey jude · 01-05-2008, 08:51 AM

Thank you both for your kind words - and to know others know what it is like. I am headed out to the Humane Society to bring his bed, food, toys, etc in a few minutes.

Judy

RonE · 01-05-2008, 09:13 AM

17 years? Wow! You obviously took great care of your little guy.

What you've done is really the last, great, unselfish act you can perform for a dog that's given you everything for all those years. You know it's the right thing to do, but it still leaves a huge hole in your heart.

Don't be shy about sharing stories about Cappy here. You won't find a more understanding group anywhere and I think it helps. It's kind of a cyber-wake to honor and remember a great dog.

Inga · 01-05-2008, 09:27 AM

God bless you for taking such wonderful care of your little friend. Saying good bye to a friend of 17 years is a horrible thing to have to do. The fact that it hurts so much is a testament to the love you had in your heart for this fabulous little dog. I said good bye to my angel dog in November as well so I do understand. I still cry from time to time but I Thank God for the happy memories I have of her. I am sure you will do the same. When you are ready you can tell us more about him. I bet he was gorgeous. Rest in Peace little Cappy.

shell07 · 01-05-2008, 12:38 PM

I am so sorry for your loss. That is the worst part of life-death. But 17 years is a very long time! I am sure you have many lovely memories of him, that will be easier to laugh about as time heals. I can see you have great love for your little one, and it is never easy to let a family member go. I just recently had to put a dog of 12 years to sleep, one that I was dog sitting since November, and I have known for years, and even though he wasn't mine, he touched a special place in my heart and it was very hard for me as well-I don't really think it gets easier, but please know you have a great family here at DF who will be here for you to "listen". Bless your heart for being such a great parent and friend to little Cappy. I am sure he is missing you just as much as you are missing him. Rest In Peace Cappy. Shell

hey jude · 01-05-2008, 10:46 PM

Thanks again, everyone for responding. I still can't believe that my buddy is gone. I am crying as I type. I know it will get better. I brought all his things (beds, meds, food, toys, bandanas, etc.) to the Humane Society today.

ChrissyBz · 01-05-2008, 10:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hey jude

Thanks again, everyone for responding. I still can't believe that my buddy is gone. I am crying as I type. I know it will get better. I brought all his things (beds, meds, food, toys, bandanas, etc.) to the Humane Society today.

That is a wonderful way of honoring his memory.

digits mama · 01-06-2008, 12:42 PM

hey jude.....Were all here for you...When the tears dry you will begin to smile when thinking of Cappy. ((hugs))

Mudra · 01-06-2008, 06:33 PM

I am so sorry for your loss. I hope CAPPY's memory will help you recover soon.

poodlemom · 01-08-2008, 08:33 PM

We had to have our beloved standard poodle Riley PTS on 10/31/03 due to kidney failure. It was a horrible time, but we could not bear to see her suffer any longer.

We brought Abbie, another stp, home 3 days later. Bringing a new life home was the best thing for us, and we added another stp girl to our home this summer. I think we honor the memory of our much-loved pets by bringing others into our homes and giving them happy lives. Do not mourn too long.

You are in my prayers.

Pax · 01-09-2008, 07:43 AM

I am so very sorry for your loss.

hey jude · 01-09-2008, 04:49 PM

Thanks to all of u who have responded to me. My life has totally changed w/o him. I still think I hear him in the house. My newspaper is not picked up at 7 a.m. when he use to go out. It is weird staying at work at noon and not coming home. Not seeing his water/food bowl in the kitchen; not having to walk over baby gates; not leaving a radio on for him all day. That is just a few of the thing and there are many.

Thanks again for thinking of me - you all are great.

Jm

ACampbell · 01-11-2008, 12:55 AM

I'm very sorry to hear your loss...I know how hard it is...my story is on here as well from October when I had to put our 15 yr old Basset to sleep.
Sometimes, I still feel guilty too, and I still cry...I'm assuming this is normal and try not to think about it too much, but I know how you feel.
I didn't answer my phone for a week, just didn't feel like talking about it and everyone I knew was calling to ask. Time does heal all wounds, but that doesn't mean it can't take a LONG time to heal...everyone heals in their own time and I hope that you feel better soon.

ohrats9 · 01-11-2008, 11:15 PM

I have had dogs die on me and I have had to put them down. It doesn't matter which way it goes, every single one, every single time rips me to tiny pieces.

When I am dealing with it I turn my thinking around. Every time I focus on their death I force myself to think of three things about their life that was fabulous and I force myself to breath with my stomach while smiling. That way the constant barrage of negative thoughts are immediately met with a calm demeanor and pleasant thoughts. It has always helped me get through it.

I'm sorry for your loss. I'm glad you gave your dog such a long happy life. I won't tell you time heals. Okay, I will.

Ella'sMom · 01-18-2008, 09:25 AM

Just read this. I hope that you are starting to heal somewhat. We never forget our little babies that we have to say goodbye to. My heart goes out to you. God bless.

Lucky Dog · 01-18-2008, 10:41 AM

Hugs from Penny and me. Let the tears flow, take each stage as it comes, remember the sweet times. Allow yourself time to grieve. Find a good (human) friend, to share memories and pictures.

hey jude · 02-01-2008, 07:52 PM

I am just reading your response to me. Thanks so much. Your baby looks just like my little guy (poodle : ) Every day it get a 'little' better - just a 'little'.... Take care and love your location (Red Sox Nation!) Go Pats!

ohrats9 · 02-02-2008, 02:18 AM

I just read a quote and thought of you:

Time takes time.

I hope this finds you well and you are feeling better.