Need help with a quality of life question?

hulkamaniac

Brutus has been really lethargic for the last week and a half or so. For the last 3-4 days he hasn't eaten at all (which is extremely unusual for him). I finally got him to eat by soaking his food in water, but you could tell it was only under protest more than anything. He's not the guy who lives to eat any more. He won't leave his crate any more. I was waving a dog biscuit just outside the crate door and he wouldn't even move. I had to wave some leftover pizza just to get him to decide that maybe, just maybe, it was worth leaving the crate.

I've also discovered that his tumor he had cut out 6 months ago has now come back. It's further back in his throat and sometimes gets in the way of his breathing. My guess is it's also causing pain when he eats as hard pieces of food hit it.

I've got an appointment with the vet for tomorrow morning. I'm afraid the end may be near for my old man. He is 12 or 13 (depending on what paperwork you look at) so it may be time for him. I just hate to lose him though, but he's clearly not the dog he was when I got him a year ago. He's not the same dog who was rooting the food bin just a few weeks ago. All he wants to do is lay around. He rarely howls in his crate any more and you get the impression he's just doing it on general principles and nothing else.

It's possible that surgery (again) could give him another 6 months or so, but it's also possible that I'm only thinking of this for me and not him. What happens after another 6 months if/when the tumor comes back? Do I put him under surgery again? I will say the last time he had surgery, he wasn't acting this way beforehand. He was still getting into all kinds of trouble and being a general pain. This time, he just lays around and isn't interested. It's not like him. Any general advice? We have a vet appointment tomorrow morning.

Luce

This isn't the advice you're looking for, because only you know if your dog has reached that point, but when we had to put our 15 yr old cocker down because she was just too miserable and sick, we got the vet to come to our house, instead of taking her to the vet. She was relaxed and not stressed, Mum sat on the floor, Gypsy came and rested in her lap, mum gave her cuddles while the vet gave her the injection, and then stroked her and talked to her as she fell asleep. Then, when mum was ready, they carried the body out to the vet's car. Mum didn't have to see Gypsy put in a bag or anything. And they gave us the option of returning later with her ashes. Much nicer way to go than on a steel table.

If you do decide to put your dog down, maybe you could ask your vet if s/he offers a similar service?

Amnesia

My parents adopted an older rescue dog 2 years ago and she came with a number of health problems, some of which they knew about, others not until the end.

They only had her for a year and she took that final downturn and they put her out of her pain.

It was hard for them, but they knew it was the kindest thing for her and they took comfort from knowing that for the last year of her life, she was a pampered and adored, happy dog.

It the heartbreaking point all of us dog owners reach. I think you already know what you need to do for him. Let us know how it goes at the vets, there will be lots of people here who know exactly what you are going through.

Take care.

pittsabowawa

I'm so sorry that Brutus isn't doing well. My only advice is to let him tell you if he is ready to go or not.. you will know when he is ready.

I'll be keeping you and Brutus in my thoughts.

hulkamaniac

I just know he's never been like this. The last time we had the tumor removed he was just as active as ever, he just had a bleeding tumor in his mouth. He was still able to eat, breathe and get into the usual ammount of trouble. Now he just lays around is more ambivalent about life in general than he usually is. I hate making a decision like this and I'm afraid I'll kick myself no matter what I decide to do.

pittsabowawa

Its never an easy decision. I would wait and see what the vet says before getting too stressed. Good Luck.

railNtrailcowgrl

I know that it is a really hard decision to make, I've had to make it too many times and no matter what you decide to do you'll second guess yourself. It's never easy and you just have to listen to your gut and the vet's opinion. When I was a junior in HS my old cat (that I had had since I was 5) started to deteriorate and I took too long to decide what was 'best' for him. We tried to keep him comfortable and by the time I finally made the decision there was no life life in him. He was a shell of his formal youth and I regret every day that I kept him for as long as I did. I was selfish and I wish that I could go back and give him the pain free, 'happy' ending that he deserved. I'm not saying your selfish here, just listen to your gut and listen to Brutus, they'll tell you when it's time. I'll keep you both in my thoughts & prayers.

FilleBelle

Clifford is the only dog I've ever had to chose when to put down. He was in terrible shape since the day we got him, barely able to hobble three houses to the end of the block and sometimes incapable of making it to the door when he had to defecate. But he loved his life. He liked chewing a bone in the backyard, he liked a rough belly rub, he wagged his tail at people he met on his daily "walks," he loved his dinner. He never physically got worse, but I knew when he stopped wanting to leave the house for a walk and couldn't finish his dinner standing up that it was over. He wasn't getting any more joy out of his life, which was truly tragic because he seemed to love it so much previously. It only took me a day to make up my mind, call the vet, and take him in.

You will make the right choice, whatever that ends up being. You will not need to kick yourself.

didee

For me, I just knew when it was time. And truly, in a way, she DID tell me. But even though I "knew" at the time, I second guessed myself after the fact. Who knows why we torture ourselves that way. But I realized after awhile that it was clearly the right decision. Just trust your instincts. The vet's assessment will probably help you.

My heart goes out to you and Brutus.

hulkamaniac

Tonight he only ate half his food even though I had watered it down. It's just not like him at all to leave a half full food bowl. Then he wouldn't come out of his crate. I had to pull him out and that was only under protest. I had to carry him outside because he wouldn't go under his own power. I hate seeing him like this. I really do. He seems to get worse all the time.

GottaLuvMutts

Sorry, hulk. See what the vet says tomorrow, but I don't think anyone would blame you for putting him down now. He's had many good years of trash-tipping and rooting in the food bin.

lucidity

I hated reading this post because it almost made me cry

I think it sounds like it might be time, but ask your vet for his opinion. I hope it goes well. I already miss reading stories about Brutus trying to steal food! Moping around really isn't his thing, huh.

Good luck, whatever you choose to do.

hulkamaniac

The vet examined him and it turns out he's lost 10 lbs over the past 6 mos or so. She did an x-ray and discovered the osteosarcoma had spread all over his body and his internal organs which she suspected was why he had stopped eating. Eating was painful for him. She said we could make him comfortable at home or have him PTS. At home he is lethargic, can't get in and out of my house (I had to carry him out on Friday) and can't even counter cruise any more as his legs have tumors and won't support his weight.

Brutus left for the bridge at about 9:20 CST. I miss him.

MegaMuttMom

None of us will ever forget Brutus. I hope there was a giant trash can waiting for him on the other side. I'm sorry for your loss.

Darkmoon

I'm so sorry You did the right thing. See you at the rainbow bridge Brutus.

pittsabowawa

I'm so so sorry. Well will all miss Brutus and his antics. You honestly did the right thing. Keeping you and Brutus in my thoughts and prayers.

Cracker

Oh Hulk. I am so very very sorry.
I'm typing through my tears, here.

You did the right thing.

It is never easy but sending a beloved friend to the bridge when there is no pleasure for him anymore is a GIFT of LOVE. May Brutus be welcomed to the bridge by all the others who have gone before, bearing garbage cans full of the bestest stuff he could ever imagine. He will be there to meet you when it is your time. Hugs to you and Zero.


I have always found these poems to be great comfort:

Indian Prayer

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you wake in morning hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starlight at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there. I did not die


I Loved You Best
By: Jim Wilis

So this is where we part, My Friend,
and you'll run on, around the bend,
gone from sight, but not from mind,
new pleasures there you'll surely find.

I will go on, I'll find the strength,
life measures quality, not its length.
One long embrace before you leave,
share one last look, before I grieve.

There are others, that much is true,
but they be they, and they aren't you.
And I, fair, impartial, or so I thought,
will remember well all you've taught.

Your place I'll hold, you will be missed,
the fur I stroked, the nose I kissed.
And as you journey to your final rest,
take with you this...I loved you best.

ioreks_mom

I am so sorry but I feel that you made the right decision.

I am sure that Brutus has unending garbage cans to tip and food bins to root through now.

ladyshadowhollyjc

I'm sorry you had to make this decision today. Never an easy one, even if it is for the best.

SupaSweet777

I am very sorry for your loss. I will keep you in my thoughts.